No clit flickage. No penis in the p-hole. These women claim to have the fried egg noodles climaxed out of them from nothing more than a good ole' palm tickling. Do I believe it? No. Will I try this at P.F. Changs? Yes.

Date: 02/11/15 | Views: 34 | Category: Asians

Tits like a 2x4, anal has a 30 sec time limit and facials send her running. If there's an instructional video out there on what not to do during your first porn scene, I'd recon this derp just paved the way for a sequel.

Date: 02/10/15 | Views: 31 | Category: LMAO

He's got a unique look. It's 3 parts dianabol, 1 part my dad still gives me an allowance. If any of you are the betting type, I've got season 3 of the Martin Lawrence show on VHS that says his butthole is not a virgin.

Date: 02/09/15 | Views: 13 | Category: Assholes

Undoubtedly the most erotic thing I've seen since responding to an OKCupid message from a girl named 'The Violator'. Results were similar if you replace Emma Watson with Liam Neeson. And mask with real face.

Date: 02/06/15 | Views: 17 | Category: Celebrities

This is now-famous, OSU alumni Kendra Sunderland. Definitely late on this. Nevertheless, enjoy. For this is the only girl that's made me consider tapping my waifu body pillow fund to pay legal fees. Hardcore vid HERE.

Date: 02/05/15 | Views: 6 | Category: Hot

The most important things my time on the Internet has taught me you ask? Stay the fuck out of South America, and women love it when you get creative. Now crank that DEWALT 20-Volt and Bob Vila that hoe.

Date: 02/04/15 | Views: 11 | Category: Squirting

Much like the original Evil Dead trilogy, this goes from semi-erotic to LULZ pretty damn quick. Unfortunately no book can close the hole this Hawaiian superman just opened. Captions supplied by Julliard's latest dropout.

Date: 02/03/15 | Views: 26 | Category: Anal

A conga line of partially community college-educated females being doused in homemade nut chutney: a.k.a. business as usual at the Casting Couch. That is, until you get to 5:35. Rite Aid just got it's new spokesgirl.

Date: 02/02/15 | Views: 15 | Category: LMAO

Mia Khalifa: Pornstar of the millennium, and the only confirmed female to cause more havoc in the middle east than virgin cattle. She gets more death threats in a week than my mailbox gets bulldyke hatemail. #HOT

Date: 02/01/15 | Views: 16 | Category: Hot

Check out that mud flap @ 20:42. After no more than 3 minutes of spelunking the b-hole, Alley McBeal finds out why methamphetamine and Chipotle don't mix. $7 and a Menudo t-shirt says this isn't her first shit-ervention.

Date: 01/31/15 | Views: 6 | Category: Nasty

Incestial overtones, moose-like oral sex and a webcam pre-dating the 1st season of Power Rangers. This has it all, and Miss Giggles earned bonus points @ 3:25. Not even D & B swag can swing her out of this family tree.

Date: 01/30/15 | Views: 7 | Category: Incest

Epic tolerance on her part. She's got that "my daddy doesn't love me so I listen to Limp Bikit on vinyl" look down to a science. Brings a fuckin tear to my eye TBH.

Date: 01/29/15 | Views: 3 | Category: WTF

To all 12 female viewers of this site that hope to one day be happily married: Break out the etch-a-sketch & take notes. She has the formula. Perky, tits like nutella-filled clouds and non-VIP access to the cellar door.

Date: 01/27/15 | Views: 11 | Category: Anal

Have you met a man that could make a Bukkake video totally solo? You're going to today. If ever a time was needed to bring in a camera that shoots 1000 frames per second, it was for a guy that nuts like I urinate.

Date: 01/26/15 | Views: 1 | Category: Amateur

Uncontrollable dry-heaving, borderline tears and noises I've only once heard out of the possum exhibit at the Cleavland Zoo: These are the quintessentials for making sure you never get called back for a sequel.

Date: 01/24/15 | Views: 8 | Category: Derp

Marvel in the awe of an ass that's got more bounce in it than the entire WNBA roster. This future wife loves sex like I love slightly discounted irregular Oreo cookies.

Date: 01/23/15 | Views: 4 | Category: Flexible

A classic, buried in the eFukt archives sees the light of day once again. Not for teh lulz, but to make sure we all remember that by always turning to the left, this was the closest any black man ever got to NASCAR.

Date: 01/22/15 | Views: 5 | Category: Freaks

She looks like something out of Stephen King's Creepshow. He has the gut of a polar bear in it's third trimester. It was never meant to be... but somewhere between New Jersey & Bangkok, they found true love.

Date: 01/21/15 | Views: 4 | Category: Seniors

You know you're in the golden age of porn when someone hires Tom Savini for a scene. Too bad the novelty of a 3rd hole wears off pretty quick when it's got the height-to-width ratio of a paper shredder.

Date: 01/20/15 | Views: 5 | Category: Bizarre

She's got the dick suckin experience of a 40-year-old virgin and a complete lack of tolerance to boot. But when you've only got $13 and the glory hole is closed for repairs, performance isn't exactly a deal breaker.

Date: 01/18/15 | Views: 15 | Category: LMAO