Big wtf @ #3. She taps out, instigates a fist fight and then concludes that all in all it was "fun and amazing". No lady. Going diarrhea in a community pool overun by minorities is fun and amazing. What happened to u was unceremoniously brutal.
Dude has an 85/15 ball-to-cock ratio and a girlfriend that could vacuum a house without ever plugging a cord in. Should I be jealous or order some saline or... ?
bbKitten. She's 5 foot 2, barely 100lbs and every time that sphincter is put under pressure, her expression looks like Billie Eilish after being told she has to stop looking like a chain-smoking trailer park supervisor for more than 18 seconds.
I can forgive the potato-grade video quality. I understand the lack of names to prevent Instagram stalking. But cutting off the girls @3:39 before they ran to use honey dijon as lubricant? ZERO/5 stars you simple-minded, incredulous fuck bag.
I don't know what fucking science experiment we're witnessing here, but every time this specimen makes contact with her uterus his face morphs into Elon Musk's hairline in 1998: Disturbing, and unsalvageable w/o cosmic intervention.
Just when you think it's safe to love again. edit: That isn't the fucking video I originally linked to. Listen champs, I don't need your help to be made a fool of. My lifetime ban from every Denny's handicap stall in the country does that for me.
The upside to being treated like the exhaust pipe of a Chevrolet El Dorado? Literally nothing. All you have to do is breath and the alpha male fantasy fan fiction will magnetize to you like a herpes outbreak at a Playboi Carti concert.
$20.00 and the last bite of my Cheeseburger Hamburger Helper says she uses dumbass phrases like "amazeballs and ""awesome sauce" and "i'll kill you if I find you hiding in my bushes with a camera again mother fucker". Typical millennial.
If you're the kind of person that enjoys peak sigma male behavior, then this is the video for you. I'm talking the kind of blueprint that guy who used to dress up as a latex demon and run into the woods to shove leaves up his ass couldn't follow.
It could be legit. This wouldn't be the first time a college bro agreed to sample some expired salami in exchange for living rent-free. Annnnd it won't be the last.
Imagine putting trust in a man that has been through this disaster and lived to tell the tale. Time for Alyssa to pack up those meatballs and reassess the future.
Sometimes I ask myself, how exactly did we get this far as a society? Then I remember Reddit has 50 million active users and it all starts to make sense.
Inflation is nearing 8%, gas costs more than your 3rd divorce... and you're burning through c-notes so you can jack yourself off with Ginger-Lynn's pinky crammed up your cinnamon ring? Dave Ramsey is gonna shit his appropriately priced pants.
Dude's hung like a boomerang and she's 1 Netflix marathon away from a mid-life crisis. In other words: This is the greatest love story our generation has ever seen.
sry, can't verify more than 1% of these participants are married. But tomorrow is 3:16 day and I've had enough pre-gamed steveweisers to make that ninja turtle in the 1st pic look doable. All I'm sayin is, the garbanzo bean has been activated.
Emphasis on those gravity bags at 5:00 too. Jell-o has spent 100 years marketing physics like this and have failed miserably in comparison. Turns out all you need is a 1-bedroom apartment in Latvia and a c-section scar to make math fun again.
