Further proof everything you touch in public has probably been shit, pissed, vomited and cummed on. Multiple times. But not always in that exact order.
A better title for this one would be "Last nights pasta primevera makes a surprise reappearance but my daughter can't stop violating herself for strangers in Uzfukisthan so I can't use my own shitter". Unfortunately there's a character limit.
When ur cum face cant be distinguished from the unfortunate soul paid to scrub porcelain at Taco Bell on Cinco de Mayo, it may be time to reevaluate your idea of eroticism. Or just watch this techno freddy fuck instead. Like I give a bullcrap.
I know that look. Normally mistaken for being on the wet end of a crypto rug pull, or ur proctologist reaching for spicy mayo instead of an authorized lubricant; it's caused by something totally different. And in most cities u can get it for $20/rock.
I can't prove it, but girl in white definitely lost her virginity to an Elden Ring action figure, and the other might doing this to feed her family. Either way ยป no refunds
Billy saved all of his birthday nickles for his favorite street performer... only to be left at half mast and dryer than an asshole full of sand paper. The dream is dead.
Just some unanswered questions before we proceed with this one; Why? How? And is that a black label copy of Final Fantasy 7 sitting underneath the camera?
I'm wondering how many Grimmace milkshakes had to be sacrificed to make this moment possible. The number is most definitely somewhere between zero and 1.
See that rush of fear around the 0:58 mark? That's the kind of reaction second only to a man that has miscalculated his maximum capacity for Mountain Dew Code Red in a public venue. And I think that's something we can all relate to.
Criticize all u want, but if it's 2AM in Frogballs Oklahoma - wtf else r u gonna do? Wait don't answer that. Let me jump my Dale Earnhardt edition Monte Carlo first.
Abhorrent use of gas station boner sauce, a storyline that doesn't care about writers strikes and wallpaper only a Babushka could love. If this doesn't at least get nominated for this years Grammy Emmy Oscar awards, I'll be left in shambles.
I'd translate the comments below the video to understand wtf is going on, but the pepperoni Hot Pockets just reached 415 degrees and my night is booked up solid.
Make sure you watch this video and dive into her Twitter wormhole first for the complete user experience. They essentially cement Hannah Hays as one of the most concerning specimens to ever Plan-B her way through the porn industry.
This one is for the homies that asked me wtf happened to that girl who looks like Sarah Palin crossbreed her with a gerbil? As fate would have it, not even a pandemic slowed down her quest to hate cum on a budget. Yikes and gadzooks.
Face like Billie Eilish
Tits like a GTA create-a-character
Sex drive like she's in a union for ass-eating
Gentleman: Meet your newest reason to get a restraining order.
Is it real? Is it fake? Nobody truly knows when the video originates in the land of communist coochi. Not only that, but expect your primal curiosity in traditional wallpaper to be tripled at a minimum before this is over. Today is a learning day.
Don't laugh at this. Even if your soul is more decayed than Robert De Niro's asshole after a weekend visit to a naval base, it should still tell you that giggle time is officially cancelled until Ricardo is located and a proper sequel is made.
Consider this both a tutorial and realty check for making proper life decisions. update: apparently the backlash from this video drove her to re-brand and start doing dry-anal scenes at home lol. Her new Paisley Pepper account is HERE
Mia Khalifa has been called a lot of things: Infamous, Disgraceful, Roblox Tit Jobber... but I prefer the term visionary. aka originator of the nerdgasm.
Don't let the cute face & lack of Valtrex in this video fool you: Even the hot ones make mistakes in the eternal quest for 11 seconds of Instagram fame.
