Nothing quite spells C-O-L-L-E-G-E-L-I-F-E like a supposed Navy Seal turned male pornstar challenging 80+ CSUN students to a backyard beatdown whilst completely naked and armed with nothing but a slowly deflating boner. HAHA.
Pretty sure this one is a complete setup, but she's definitely been down this road before. The "a guy tried to pay me for sex in Canadian pennies so I punched his cock" is a reaction that can only be experienced - not learned. Ask me how I know.
Today we're going to learn 3 imporant things, so find your trapper keeper and listen closely: #1: Shamelessness is alive and well. #2: Usage of a pretty girl is negotiable. And #3: A guy shaped like GRU has seen more action than me today.
Pretty slick combination of fuckery and remorse going on here. side note: This site makes this kind of compilation video for every update they post (among all their other efukt-inspired edits) and that's not just cool... it's COOL AS ICE
18 & doesn't know what an orgasm is. But here, all that matters is the size of your imagination... and truthfully speaking, dude got a fat one. Emphasis on proportions. That clit looks like a deflated water balloon glued to straw...
As fate would have it, handing out rusty tugboats to guys that consider bratwurst one of the elite food groups, isn't the high profile, second source of income she originally thought it out to be. Live, learn & sanitize, BECKY.
This is what happens when you let nerds interact with women in a live environment. Safe spaces are destroyed, genitals exposed - all cause some marvelous bastard found a way to add gangrape DLC to GTA5. HILARIOUS.
See that face at the 3:40 mark? I'm familiar with that face. It's the why the fuck did I leave my tenure at IHOP for this? face. lol no shit lady. 1.) Butter Pecan syrup is FIRE 2.) You wouldn't be the new poster girl for feminism.
This is what happens when you permit woman to consume alcohol before the sun goes down. Anuses are bruised, memes are created - all because 2 derpettes couldn't GPS their cornholes to a safer environment.
The paramount collection (read: 8 JPGS) of a girl oblivious to gentleman around the world soiling their bicycle shorts to her Facebook account. Maybe I'm alone here, but I'm seeing tough love across the board.
Name one thing Pierre 'THE MACHINE' Woodman has not yet encountered at the end of his French baguette? If you said radical spinal surgery with a crisp hint of daddy issues, you're pretty much on the right path.
The Dating Playbook by Andrew Ferebee. Buy yourself TWO copies. Cause the current approach of turning your dick into a secret item on the Buffalo Wild Wings menu isn't really panning out, brah. More HERE.
My stance on remaking classics goes from "fuck you" to "where's the damn sequel?" as these masters of cinema dismember a baker's dozen worth of stunt cocks in a way that would make Tom Savini soil himself in envy.
That's it. As far as I'm concerned porn has officially jumped the shark dinosaur. Not even at the height of one of my patented LSD + Carl's Jr. wombo combo benders did I envision something as despicable as this.
Somewhere between the home depot sheetrocking, and her costar having a more objectionable gunt than the entire NFL draft, I've lost the desire to masturbate. But one things for sure: Waterboarding works. Proof: This.
Cornelius-approved sex toy releases an unexpected bodily fluid, as the entire room watches in utter digust. She ends up completely embarrassed. You end up completely erect. Quote of the week heard at 4:45.
Japan-inspired remix involving serious g-spot stimulation and someone's first experience with Windows Movie maker goes horribly... right? Sounds like a direct spot in the Billboard 100 to me. And now I have a direct boner.
Tojiro Kawasaki Jr can't find his safe space when an anchovy-scented stripper makes a beeline for his face, muff-first. 2 words lady: SUMMER'S EVE. Pick it up at your local pharmacy right next to the Pikachu enemas.