Impressing one of the biz's finest enough to get a personal meet and greet hog squeezin? If true, every Sanjeet and Hasan on this side of Twitch.tv was just given a new reason to stop shitting on the street corner and start reaching for the stars.
hmm I bet she hasn't felt this kind of satisfaction since going lvl 99 Karen at the McDonald's drive-thru and actually getting that 2nd dipping sauce on the house.
At 9:36 she says "u really pounded my ass". In my part of the Internet that's code for "do you want to marry me" and for the love fuck my dude, I better hear a yes.
A not-so happy ending when our main man Johan Bonerstein starts slinging sour cream all over her work space. A request to "suck it" is instantly met with resistance, proving without a shadow of a doubt: money can't buy you happiness.
Some sign up to get a girl through hard times. Others are forced after failing to pay prostitutes in Wendy's coupons. They all start off good, but like me during Terminator Dark Fate, it only takes 27 seconds to realize you wasted your money.
Looks like classic #stoya content, but I could be wrong. The cucked out army of millennials that have mainstreamed this behavior always makes you wonder...
Free tip for my viewers: Next time your date night budget is under $20.00, try replacing the Taco Bell drive-thru with something like Panera. Otherwise you end up getting a front row to the cornhole symphony like this sad mother fucker lmao
Not exactly sure I want a single one of my erections connected to SOAD, but Becky 47-chromes just changed the jack-off game forever. I don't know who she is - but those milkers are like a psychic, warning of all future restraining orders.
or... maybe it's actually the best one-nighter ever? I guess that really depends on what your tolerance for White Claws is and which part of Wisconsin you're from.
I'm not even sure what's going on here. I see too much ink, Too little testosterone and a modified titty twister that's normally reserved for revenge videos. No further info than that, so... time for some hashtags. #farmersonly #simps4wimps
A quick romp and stomp in the ol' ravioloi tent gets diverted when a capacity limit is reached. As expected, a game-uninstalling rage-quit quickly ensues. #ifapped
Desperate for attention and not afraid of having their pork chop piss flaps online forever. If these aren't the quintessential for the independent woman of 2020, I don't know what is. Now save up those OnlyFans subs and overnight the Valtrex.
Oh man, I haven't seen the "sniff test" in action since backpage.com was a thing. I can't really say I ever banged a perfect 10 on there, but one night, I nailed 5 twos.
I have never seen this level of pretension used as small talk before getting full nelsoned up the rusty chimney. I'd suggest coming clean about your 3rd first year at HTML school, but my nuggets have grown cold and I've already lost interest.
There's a thin line between heavy petting and questionable assaults on the girl who bags your almond milk at whole foods. Where that line exists... I don't know. But judging by the wet spot under her taint I'd wager this roastie has found it.
Let me take you back to a simpler time when rebelling against the system meant small insurance claims on your neighbor's Jeep Cherokee. Compared the 2020 warzone, I'd say Becky only racked up 1 star with this one. #doingitforthegram
Up and cummer Isla Summer has her spotlight taken away by a guy that sounds like he knows the birthday of every Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. I don't approve.
This is about as real as the KFC family feast meal's promise of not making you sing Johnny Cash between flushes. But it's worth posting just to show how far deep fake technology has cum. Next Up: Joe Biden's Urban Glory Hole Gaggers.
Take Sarah Palin, crossbreed her with a cum-phobic gerbil and this would be the result. Sweet mother of fucking cringe, I haven't seen someone this far out of their comfort zone since Burger King released their ultimate breakfast platter.
Clancy does in 5 mins, what normally takes the the food court at a shopping mall an entire afternoon: Sends an edgelord Karen's cornhole into the shadow realm.
It's been a minute since amateur porn had some drama. Meet DollsCult. A trio of Italian incest freaks that watched one too many episodes of Metaloclypse and started getting death threats for wiping their genitals all over the family tree lol
Before today there were two things I was totally certain of. 1) West Virginia is the unwashed crotch of the US of A. And 2) $47.00 doesn't get you anywhere in Russia. I've been proved wrong once today, but there will be no duplication.
This isn't just any old deviant pretending to get crotch lice at the carnival. And it may very well be the first documented swinger cuckolding. In other words: The only way Pavol is getting pussy juice on his face today is if he starts crying.
