What the skidmark hell is actually wrong with this generation? They literally can't even go 67 seconds without giving complete strangers the POV simulation of a proctologist's annual examination. And don't even get me started on the women.
All we can learn is a two-pack of Coors Light gives the confidence one needs to perform like a deranged circus animal. But today? That education is free. Practice what you see here & I promise them size 14 Bumble girls will never "lmao" again.
Vintage Exxon Mobil decor. A slight tinge of Rajeesh's piss soaked mop bucket. Nothing but 4" of drywall separating you & skidrow's finest. Romance isn't dead.
Of all the ways to leave your digital footprint on the Internet, I'd say this ranks up there in the top 3 of the absolute fucking worst ways of all time. Right behind being a food reviewer and paying to gain access to a Twitch streamer's discord.
Don't know exactly who to blame here, but judging by her mannerisms it's safe to say this happens more often than transmitting STD's at a Taylor Swift concert.
Head still attached? Organs not punctured? Zero ammunition? Considering the videos normally coming out of this country, I'd say she got off pretty f'n light...
Straight out of a Twilight fan club, Slim Jim has found himself between a promise and a dream. I'm talking a cool $0 payout. Not even enough to send that haircut back to 2009 when being a furry without admitting to being a furry made it cool.
How many times have I said "mother of fuckin' AC Fucking Slater, this dude's custard cannon probably weighs more than her entire body" ? Ninety seven. How many times did I actually mean it in the literal sense? Zero. The streak is broken.
Solid 5/10? I can sympathize. East Euro impoverish-core decor? Understandable. What I'm throwing red flags on is her ability to look like she's being sodomized by an industrial fruit juicer every time he makes contact with her clitoris. #pass
When ur cum face cant be distinguished from the unfortunate soul paid to scrub porcelain at Taco Bell on Cinco de Mayo, it may be time to reevaluate your idea of eroticism. Or just watch this techno freddy fuck instead. Like I give a bullcrap.
[alaska zade] Interesting girl. Apparently she's a full blown carpet bombing lesbian that decided to make sex videos with her guy friends out of boredom and curiosity. The real time documenting is pretty unique. edit:she already quit lol.
Galaxy Gas Gwendolyn seems to have compromised her last functioning brain cell with some combination of synthetic drugs and pineapple White Claws. Chances of homey swiping right in a coastal city ever again? Absolutely fuckin zero. Probably.
Quite possibly the most egregious abuse of power to ever grace my 14" Compaq Presario computer monitor. Mind you, this is coming from a man that's sat through all 73 unfiltered minutes of Edward Penishands. My voice matters.
First time my ass. She's about as much a sex tape virgin as I am a calorie counter at an all you can eat Chinese buffet. And let me tell you Jack; I've taken more than one wok outta commission once the crab rangoon starts hittin trays. Respectfully.
[Lama Grey] up at bat again. This (French?) testicle gremlin is simply way too popular to not follow up on. I mean, just look at her list of interests: "Dorama, anime, horses, video game. Walk, smoking weed. Play with cock) "chefskiss.gif
If this is happening in the walls of average American bedrooms, then The Nature Channel should start updating those sex ed videos. I didn't see a single antelope.
She surprisingly lacked the standard amount of lip filler that could inflate the tire of a corn harvester, so the authenticity stood a chance. Then Dames Jean enters the room from out of nowhere and took this one from "believable" to "autistic".
