protip for my ever-evolving female viewer base: If you ever find yourself in this situation, make sure you order the blooming onion first. Outback servers tend to frown upon this kind of behavior out of the gate. Don't ask me how I know.
A followup to the kind of "hELp mE sTePbRO" videos that actually look believable is a rarity. Somebodies uncle father cousin has some splainin' to do. [PART ONE]
If you're into the kind of erotica that reminds you of the black market for hackey sacks and burned Blink 182 CD's, you should probably throw them a few bucks.
I'll admit that last clip might be enough to ruin your holiday feast later today. But it's Thanksgiving and you probably need something to talk to grandma about before the sweet potatoes hit the table. You should be thanking me, Mortimer.
Considering one the participants is none other than Riley "anything is a dildo if you try hard enough" Reid I can go either way on the authenticity of this. Mainly cuz it's not the worst way to get the gift of Herpes next to a bag of Hot Cheetos.
Yeah okay buddy. This part time slam pig is about as much a cheater as I am an advocate for veganism. (hint: there's only 1 green in my house and it says Fruit of the Loom on it) Now call mom and let her know I finally recognized your work.
Reason #28971 to never judge a book by it's cover. Unless it's whatever the fuck this is. Then feel free to Judge Judy until your foreskin grows back. I'm on drugs.
What the fuck is with this "i'm not stopping until medicare qualifies her for a wheelchair" approach to slamming married women? Call me old fashioned, but I preferred when it was more romantic and hidden in Dunkin Donut bathrooms.
Last time I saw a white girl willingly hoarding this much beef, I had to throw a few right hooks in Costco's prime rib section. Pandemic era was a different timeline.
Probably has more history of torturing his partners with bodily fluids than a San Fran hostel. I'd find his work, but the DNA results keep coming back as elephant.
Just what in the fuck is actually going on here? Is she green screening her husband with 5 overlays to make it look like the local janitor union is lining up to get their own serving of anal crabs to go? We've reached the peak of technology.
Nearly 20-years-old and still doesn't know how to speak coherently. But what she lacks in basic motor function, she makes up for in grade-A prime meats. i'm sold
Just a tip: When the butthole is tight enough to take your blood pressure, a little pregame ritual might be wise. She's Bella Gray and anorexic gerbils probably produce more waste volume than she does with that trash compactor of a b-hole.
Just remembering when Gabbie Carter was the Internet's most wanted. Now, the amount of early aging porn causes has come into question again. [2019] [2021 ] inb4 we witness a union that classifies rectal trauma as a benefits package?
2 things you should definitely abandon before agreeing to shoot scenes with the reigning world champion of rectal desecration prn: Beef-a-roni, and self-respect.
No context, no explanation. Just a couple siblings that like to beat the living corn bread out of her tonsils, while recording on the finest 240p camera Gameboy has to offer. I've never seen such disrespect for polyester fashion trends in all my life.
These full force fantasies videos are starting to get a little disturbing. And like one of the greatest voices of our generation once taught us: you never go full force.
Not since walking into an unlocked Golden Corral bathroom at closing time have I seen such dishonor for married women. And just like the rest of you all watching, I am now disgusted and have an unquenchable craving for butterfly shrimp.
It seems a 2-pack of Bud Light turns you into the Gandolf of parking lot pussy pickups... and today his teachings are all free of charge. Practice what you see here and I promise those, size-11 Tinder girls will never "LMAO" at you again.
