"I'll tell ya one thing about my personal life that I've never told before. I never fucked a ten, but one night, I fucked five twos. And I think that ought to count. I think that ought to go in your record as a positive achievement." - George Carlin
Never underestimate a man's willingness to document his trophy case. You'll just end up scratching your head and crotch like you just left a Persian bachelor party.
If anything at all, you should stick around for that second-to-last clip. I don't know who, what, where, when or why - but I'll say this: There is NO un-fuckin seeing it.
Round 2 for the most depraved, fatherless, not afraid of having their tuna bowl fantasy exposed on social media, clout-chasers on the Internet today. Real deal independent women. The kind that pay for their birth control with Onlyfans subs.
Imagine having a tidal wave inside your nut sac. You'd kinda be like an airbender, except your fan base wouldn't need to be told to shower more than twice a week.
Well over an hour of the most abrasive beefy bazooka blowouts to ever have the luxury of being caught on film. Some people will be turned off to anal for life. Others will discover a new path to restraining orders. But all will be entertained.
I'll save you some time: I don't know who girls #2, 5 or 7 are. But I do know we can thank the combination of Smirnoff and Snapchat to make this video possible.
Blatant use of vaginas, Public shaming, High definition cameras -- this video is more well-rounded than the Grand Slam breakfast bill I ran out on this morning. The kicker is in the last video clip. Really brings me back to the glory (hole) days.
40+ minutes of tapioca ejections that need an episode of Bill Nye dedicated to them. Seriously, if at least some of these mutants aren't suffering from some reproductive system anomaly I'd be surprised. And willing to pay for the secret.
First time squirters, prolapse-induced climaxes and bittersweet hategasms... today's vid has more variety than a fuckin Sizzler salad bar. Best comes last, so I recommend you see this one all the way through
Certainly not the first time mother nature has had enough of our shit, but it is one of the more entertaining things I've seen. Like these compilations? originals HERE
Interesting approach to entertainment. It's like Robot Chicken lost it's virginity to a Vietnamese midget. note: crazyshit makes this kinda compilation every update (among all their other efukt-inspired edits) and that's not just cool... it's frosty.
Only 1 thing compliments the feel of a holiday weekend - And that's getting more rash on your crotch from a guy you salad-tossed in the toilet of a Portuguese farmhouse. Note to those inbreds in the last clip: Just end the bloodline here.
I've seen a lot of desperation in my day... but damn near 4 fucking hours of mid-production skin flicks trying to pass themselves off as revenge porn? I would say the Internet has officially reached a new low... but buzzfeed.com still exists.
Some women need size to get off. Others, a $12.00 shopping spree at Moe's Tex Mex Grill. Then there's Kenzie Reeves who needs no more than half a mini vienna sausage to send her convulsing back to the baby Gap her wardrobe is from.
LIFE LESSON #274: If your tolerance is weaker than Betty White's rectal control, stay the fuck away from the masturbatory demands of 4,000+ strangers. Last time I saw this many tears, I had to pay the hooker double.
okay, maybe just 1 time. Specifically #3. While the others have come and gone, this little gem remains unexplained. Full Scenes: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8
I don't mean hiding dad's Mastercard and cutting off all pumpkin-flavored drinks. I'm talking cervical damage, BBC style. It don't matter what entrance Dajeerius and friends enter: NOBODY goes home without crutches.
