Karen McGoonerson is presented a with a choice: Dance with the mayonnaise maraca she's been married to for the past 4 years, or gallop with the chocolate clydesdale. Do you really have to guess how this one is gonna end? [painfully]
uhhh, I don't know exactly when 'navigating sexually transmitted diseases on public transportation ' became a thing. But I suspect TikTok is responsible.
I get the "i gOtTa MaKe SuRe tHe ThUmbNaiL hAs tO lOoK LiKe i hAvE BRaIn dAmaGe" bullshit, but could you have spared us the fucking HVAC tape across her mouth? I'd like to keep my erection as far away from Home Depot as possible.
4 outta 5 physicians will advise against this behavior. But a lifetime of chronic digestive complications doesn't really seem to concern these prodigies. Big risks = more clout. And more clout = more fashionably retarded short form content.
[this] professional milk smuggler has once again proven nothing more than a gifted set of genetics can and will turn the Internet on it's fucking head. [more]
Where the fuck has she been practicing that technique and are they still allowed within 100 yards of Thanksgiving dinner? These 2 things seem to be intertwined.
What drives a mild-mannered college girl to abandon education and pursue a profession of having her insides prepped like a Thanksgiving turkey? Vapes? The zyns? Letting Katy Perry continue to make music? We may never know. [more]
The human experiment takes a new detour to fuck town USA, aided by wrestling memes and movies you probably never heard of. twas a fine society we had once. But like buying a video card without a home equity loan, those days are forgotten.
7 mins of screen time and not once did the camera pan down to her luke warm filipe puckered starburst, leaving viewers concerned that they have been duped into participating in false advertising. Have we entered the era of "dick-baiting"?
30 seconds in and two things will become glaringly apparent: 1) We've been grossly mislead about Alabama's tourist attractions. And 2) At least 50% of the people who seek these out have ejaculated to lawn mower maintenance videos.
Only two situations leave a person with that look on their face. And both involve serious velocity of the rectal cavity. So this is either post-anal or post-white castle.
"you get the best barrels ever dude it's just like you pull in and you just get spit right out of 'em and you just drop in and you jus' smack lip WAPAH y'drop down s'na BAH and then after that you just drop in just ride the barrel and get pitted."
1 part hypebeast, 19 parts herpes simplex two. Surely my user base doesn't need a PSA on the reasons not to raw dog a girl that considers Fruit Stripe gum a luxury item. But just in case I've given too much credence, do not try this one at home.
"Colorado tourism offers stunning mountain scenery, hiking and charming towns, attracting visitors year-round for outdoor adventure & relaxation. Key attractions include Rocky Mountain National Park, Aspen and the inside of this girl's asshole"
The real hero of today's adventure should be whatever surgeon sews that bag of expired beef back together in the last clip. It seems learning how to be a boxer through YouTube videos with a language barrier has consequences. More [here]
Nothing screams "modern day eroticism" quite like a circumcised Slavic beating his shit to a showering sibling. Katerina Danica Dragana should've known better.
I'm getting the impression this lady is no stranger to shotgunning a couple servings of Butthole du Jour after a succulent Chinese meal. But hit 88mph, and she calls more timeouts than a Discord moderator walking up a flight of stairs.
Going hands free may not be an option. But the Duoplex community abandoned her a long time ago so this isn't exactly a foreign concept. Applications are open.
Haven't seen that kind of disorientation in a white girl's eyes since Starbucks offered 2x points on a non-holiday. And much like inhaling $18.00 worth of overcooked coffee beans, a price will be paid for slingin that thing around.
If we could go ahead and get an ID on her, that would be fantastic. Try to time it around the Black Friday sales on 10-packs of tube socks if possible. Appreciate it.
A Chilean degenerate that treats her butthole like a dollar menu side order? The villain arc is practically writing itself. Start getting blocked on her Twitter [here]
She surprisingly lacked the standard amount of lip filler that could inflate the tire of an industrial corn harvester, so the authenticity stood a chance. Then this guy's facial reactions start flaring & slowly took this one from "believable" to "autistic".
