Sometimes I think about the amount of guttural toxic waste this man has used his dipstick to measure without protective gear. There's no way he's still alive.
Nothing has been as generous to the amateur porn community as the fish eyed camera lens. Joe Sixpack and his homie Mayonnaise Mike end up looking like people pay a cover charge to feed them at a petting zoo. But we know the truth.
George Lopez is juiced to the gills and managed to procure one of Starbuck's finest Coffee Artists™. The result? Only her gynecologist and Jiffy Lube knows.
Dude's hairline looks like a Detroit skyline and has "overdose" across his jugular. And still managed to pull a 9/10 that rawdogs anal. u no longer have any excuses.
Average Joes aren't the only ones facing resistance when trying to smash the cadburys. Semi-pro pornstars have occupational hazards too. ah well. As long as human toilet paper isn't on the menu, Beckys and Katies are still gonna be bae.
She surprisingly lacked the standard amount of lip filler that could inflate the tire of an industrial corn harvester, so the authenticity stood a chance. Then this guy's facial reactions start flaring & slowly took this one from "believable" to "autistic".
I remember when couples would upload their finest Nokia flip vids onto websites that couldn't get cleared for an SSL certificate. So trust when I say having more flash tattoos than visible skin is a bit distracting from the story ur trying to tsell.
Shame doesn't enter the conversation when your significant other is sporting the kind of tits that can end a dynasty. Even when she casts lures onto your friend's trouser trout? A niche group of people need to reevaluate their relationship goals.
Anal rly should have a universally accepted weight requirement. Performing with this lvl of proportion disparity is sure to result in a sphincter collapse comparable only to fast food muckbanging. McRib connsesuries know what I'm talking about.
What's truly ridiculous is the volume of desperate comments under this video. Bangladesh treating Xhamster like a dating app will never not be amusing to me.
Being converted into a middle-aged pretzel probably wasn't on the to-do list for ole' perky tits Tina, but it just took her Sheldon Scale rating from a 4 to a hefty 7.3.
Classic case of overconfidence. If only she put as much research into this man's business model as she did into Instagram's "fix my tits" filters, then maybe all of this could have been avoided. Ah well. Live, learn & never trust ads on Craigslist.
Like the thunderdome, a Woody casting means two enter but only 1 leaves with a working sphincter. The following rush to Costco's adult diaper section is usually a dark day in the victim's life... but not today. Double BOOM. Double DOOM. [more]
For these philanthropists, it's about breaking down societal norms and giving back to the community. Jump that hurdle and nothing will come between your side piece and legendary status. Save for a pair of Joseppi's tube socks or two...
I didn't even realize Bailey was still active. Then her [twitter] account popped up and showed it's possible to quadruple the size of your tits without surgery? wtf?
For these philanthropists, it's about destroying societal norms and giving back to the neighbors. Climb that mountain and nothing shall come between your communal oral cavity and legendary status. Save for a viral outbreak or four...
Self-proclaimed anaconda smuggler gets humbled after spending < 4.7 seconds on the dark side, leaving her no option but to tap out. The check isn't in the mail.
Looks like a one and done because I've never seen another video of her before. Which is a damn crying shame. The consequential followup of her getting samoan dropped inside a Del Taco handicap stall would've been worth the wait.