2004: Facebook launches for the first time, Ashlee Simpson jigged her way into irrelevancy and this jovial mother fucker was using his power of aspergers to give second stringers a reason to show up on set. I'm talkin half girth, half Pokemon.
ah, the old "my sister ate moon grass and fell on my penis" trick. A classic move, but one that gonna need more practice if it's going to give Limpin Larry enough motivation to erect the other half of his penis for her. #cialis pancho. Look into it.
Look closely and you'll notice the dive bar bathroom graffiti tattoo coverage isn't even at 30%. Unfortunately that means the future will involve heavy machinery.
Not since witnessing a mid-moshpit hookup during an Alestorm concert have I seen a love story worth sharing. And much like those adventurous un-showered creatures, Karen's performance and smell won't be forgotten any time soon.
Nothing screams "modern day eroticism" quite like a circumcised Slavic beating his shit to a showering sibling. Katerina Danica Dragana should've known better.
If there's anything these South American floozys do right with their 3600 baud Internet and flip phone cameras, it's this. Pack ur favorite anti viral and take notes.
5 foot 3, weighs less than a soggy bag of Thanksgiving leftovers and literally can't keep a penis out of her mouth for 19 consecutive seconds. No it's not whoever smoked your ass in that last Arc Raiders game -- It's gotta be kane [mira monroe]
What's truly ridiculous is the volume of desperate comments under this video. Bangladesh treating Xhamster like a dating app will never not be amusing to me.
Only two situations leave a person with that look on their face. And both involve serious velocity of the rectal cavity. So this is either post-anal or post-white castle.
Like the thunderdome, a Woody casting means two enter but only 1 leaves with a working sphincter. The following rush to Costco's adult diaper section is usually a dark day in the victim's life... but not today. Double BOOM. Double DOOM. [more]
This is what happens when Chaturbate gets saturated w/ day-ones and you have to find new ways to scalp juicer tokens. All because a taxi driver from Tanzania can't stop maxing out his data so he can tell asiangirl8537 to "show anal & borb".
Havent seen that kinda disorientation in a white girls eyes since Starbucks offered 2x points on a non-holiday. And much like willingly inhaling $18 worth of over cooked coffee beans, a price will be paid for accepting a duel with this goliath.
Gotta respect a man that can make a white girl stop in her tracks faster than a Target clearance sale by simply removing his Nike Dri-FITs, and hangin' brain.