Everyone else is talkin about stimulus checks and economic downfall, and I'm just waitin for girls to start masturbating in the middle of Target again. #oldfashioned
See that smile? That's the smile of a man that just realized there's more to life than Mountain Dew Code Red and referring to his Modern Warfare acquaintances as African Americans over Xbox Live. Quarantine has bonded us with the planet.
Show me a woman that puts this much effort into her homemade skin flicks, and I'll show you the kind of divorced mother of three I want Dr. Phil to dedicate an entire episode to. Cash me outside the 7-11 begging for Slim Jims, how bout dat?
Amateur Meme Porn: Sometimes it's about as exciting as an audio book of Ted Cruz customizing a value meal at Burger King. But throw in a girl with 2 moms and pays her vagisil bill with Venmo tips, and suddenly you got faps for days.
Deep inside a double-wide trailer decorated with street signs and rebel flags exists a video that will make you understand why Walmart not only exists, but thrives in our society. I mean there's nothing else to say... just... just watch.
Well over an hour of the most abrasive beefy bazooka blowouts to ever have the luxury of being caught on film. Some people will be turned off to anal for life. Others will discover a new path to restraining orders. But all will be entertained.
Ever find yourself asking the question: What would happen if you spiked Freddy Kreuger's Ambien with boner pills, let Michael Myers into a glory hole and told Jason Voorhees that teenage pussy has a better use than pitchfork storage?
Imagine if this technology existed in the Pamela Anderson era of near-washed up celebrity hybrid attention whore porn? Poster sales would have gone to zero man.
You know your token bucket is going to be overflowing when you up your camshows wiener-to-girl above symmetrical ratios. Sprinkle in a little implied sexual assault and you got yourself a formula for Chaturbate longevity friends.
This entire glorious scene is one beautiful train wreck and I can't fucking wait to hear a epic drum and bass remix of this. :) Full Scene (Mandy): HERE. [Remix #1]
When your saddle bag is knee-level, and the age of medicare is on the horizon - maybe being labeled a sexual predator becomes the least of your problems? But for everyone else watching: You shouldn't even attempt this one. Like... seriously.
Nothing special here. Just your yearly reminder that her rockbottom, last attempt to stay relevant-sex tape has not been created yet. But trust me... it's priced in.
The one and only Danika Mori The original teflon rectum wizard, and might I say - still the best. Her anal acrobatics set such a standard in the renaissance days of amateur porn uploads, I almost forgot she even used her vag recreational activity.
Tired of jacking off to the same old fantasies of Cardi B in a bath tub full of Velveeta cheese and want the next best thing? How about the bi-product of a 50,000-Karma Reddit account? I'm talking fatal levels of simp neckbearding here.
damn son, check out the dimensions on him. You may have a confusing dream or 2 about being bludgeoned to death by it. Big emphasis on death. The graveyard would be a guarantee if you were to sword fight Captain Black Sparrow over here.
