And by gangbang I mean one single sexually inept man losing his virginity, while Oscar De Lahoya's 2 cousins spectate. Only thing missing is a Mariachi band and that one token black guy repeatedly screaming "wurlstar". Cut and reshoot, thx.
Ever see the movie The Cable Guy'? Me neither, but if they wanted to make a porn spinoff with a heterosexual storyline... it would probably look something like this.
This is bad. More bad than the time I emptied $27 worth of Wendy's value meals into the plastic case of Ninja Turtles III: The Manhattan Project for NES and slipped it in a Blockbuster drop-box. Wait no, that was priceless.
It's all fun n' games until your pre-planned window of jack off time gets commandeered. Humiliation hits these tards like a sac of Power Rangers VHS tapes, but some of them refuse to quit. Essentially redefining 'integrity'.
To my ever growing .07% female viewers: put on your bifocals and pay the fuck attention. This is what u DON'T do before getting married. Stay classy & save the dick-crazed cluster fuck swap parties for college girls and India.
Interruption @10:06. And whats our heroes reaction? Going Wayne & Garth on his bashful costar. Don't feel too bad lady. Seeing as I just beat off to the 8 seconds of your howler monkey mother, you're still a star in my book.
Gotta respect a guy that's more interested in his 50% Off Panda Express coupon, than questioning why his 18-year-old daughter is naked in front of the family webcam. Balancing priorities are an integral part of fatherhood.
Fuck whoever said having vested interest in your community is for losers. This lady's 11:00AM stakeout just netted her enough Tier-1 mental imagery to fuel her faps all the way to next year's Labor Day. Way to score Stacy!
As if coming home to a dinner plate full of rice and fried octopus anus wasn't bad enough, Dik tu Small has to lay the smackdown on a woman that isn't content with a single spring roll. The hardships of the working man.
Spend $99 on camera equipment and suddenly you're the new face of humiliation porn. Do I believe this is real? No. Would I promise her my mini freezer full of Gorton's fishsticks to make a sequel? It's a solid maybe.
Maybe 'denied' is the wrong word, as it implies this shit faced Casanova was actually going to make contact before Deputy Dickbag appeared. It wasn't happening. Trust me. I've been to Burger King on a Friday night.
Sorry ladies. His sworn duty to uphold the integrity of Scuttlebutt's Twat Tavern > your breadbox munchies. TBH it's refreshing to know that women too can be cockblocked. It's all about equality on Inhumanity.com
Let's hope dude is better at guarding the food court than he is at laying pipe. Because after 38 seconds of vaginal contact, the show is over. No embarrassment, no questions. Just 1 federali multitasking like the boss.
He's got a 7.5 inch ham slammer and she dances like Jennifer Lopez after an afternoon at the gynecologist. Some people out there might say this cut off before the best part. I say mom did them a fucking favor.
Dude gets called over to a changing room to assist a random slutty with her bikini. After she briefly leaves, he relishes the moment and starts beating off while the smell of her cunt is still in the air. You da man.
