In what seems to be an effort to ultimately rent her asshole out as an airport hangar, siswet has once again pushed the envelope on what is considered 'regular rectology'. This time, taking Keemstar straight into the promised land.
Dare to browse the depths of publicly uploaded porn sites and this is the cesspool of shit you'll come across. The kind of footage that is not only questionable, but encouraged by the most degenerate hotdog connoisseurs inside the Internet.
#nostalgia Just scroll to 1:22 and remember what it was like when the only thing that mattered in life was how low you could get your ping on a 56k modem, and your stock of BAWLS GAMER JUICE. Truly a simpler time for a simpler world.
The downside of adopting an all-kale diet and moderating Reddit forums? Every uterus in your rolodex gets socialized like Chinese healthcare. And don't even get me started on the amount of Amibos you have to stock up on to stay relevant.
As fate would have it, combining the genetics of a 1st-world pornstar and modern technology yields impressive results. Now if you'll excuse me I have to take a 7-second jump roping class and gouge my fucking eyes out with a melon baller.
What happens when you combine the Czech Republic with Gordon Ramsay's internship program, and secure funding from George Soros? uhh, I'll let you know after my parents unblock me after accidentally linking them to this video lmao
Just go ahead and scroll to the 6:15 mark and ask yourself: "just what in the secret of monkey island miss cleo juju voodoo bullshit is going on here?" Because I did.
Ever find yourself asking the question: What would happen if you spiked Freddy Kreuger's Ambien with boner pills, let Michael Myers into a glory hole and told Jason Voorhees that teenage pussy has a better use than pitchfork storage?
Tired of jacking off to the same old fantasies of Cardi B in a bath tub full of Velveeta cheese and want the next best thing? How about the bi-product of a 50,000-Karma Reddit account? I'm talking fatal levels of simp neckbearding here.
Not only do women work fewer hours than men, they choose different careers. Women are more interested in people, while men are more interested in things. They also take more browns to the Super Bowl than the NFL ever has in 98 years.
Imagine swallowing enough beef to spiral the vegan community out of control, then proclaim it's not for the money. Here's a free tip: It might be more believable if you say it without the echo your butthole is emitting after doing that scene lol.
I'm a simple man. I can only imagine the sex life of an active farmersonly.com only has one dynamic to it. And we're fucking looking at it right now. #help
And by shocked I mean quietly contemplating how far into insanity social media and attention whoring has pushed society. Crazyshit.com makes these Efukt-ish videos regularly and they officially changed my life for the worse. More [HERE]
No clickbait, I'm DEAD SERIOUS. Scroll to the 3:00 min mark and pretend physics still exists. Then call Tom Savini and tell him his services are no longer required.
Wanna make ur shitty demo reels better? Feature the organic instrumentals only a Greenbay Packers fan can truly appreciate. Thats the way to the Internets heart.
I was spaghetti soft until the camera panned 12 inches south. Fucking hell, this chick is 1 injection of anesthesia away from experimental cornhole surgery & she's rippin one out like the lifeboats were deployed. I'm in love?
LIFE LESSON #237: If someone uses the word negotiable in their Craigslist ad - move the fuck on to the next one or prepare to doomsday prep on Valtrex & Clorox bleach. Discounts are temporary. War-torn genitals arent.
[tip: scroll to bottom of page for link] You know that thin piece of skin that separates the inside of a vagina from the rusty turntable? Well, her two costars just accidentally thrusted straight fucking through it. #diapers4life
This guy has a unique style. It's 1 part Tom Savini, 17 parts Jeffrey Dahmer. If any of you are the betting type, I've got the entire 3rd season of The Martin Lawrence show on VHS that says those snatch flies @ 0:16 mark are legit.
Props to guy laying pipe. I haven't heard a teenager whine that ambiguously since that time I was caught defecating in the Blockbuster drop-box in protest to late fees on my rental of Johnny Mnemonic. FULL SCENE HERE
Want proof that humans are all about charity? Look no further friendo. This charitable fuck offers a nervous local the ultimate handout - a free play on his wife's arcade box. It's generosity like this that really warms my heart.
Pregnant sisters, overly-hung midgets and a race to outdo dad's cum stains. I don't know if I'm jerking off to porn, or a Charlie Sheen family reunion.
