This condition is more commonly known as "high maintenance". It happens when all ur sexual experience comes from Ikea tutorial videos, so you seek the refuge of sigma males that have less communication skills than The Undertaker. #sad
This is about as unintentional as me using Cowabunga Bay Water's wave pool as my own personal porta potty. Apologies to visitors between years of 1997 - 2015.
Book a 3-day trip to Thailand during any given season, and you're sure to end up face-to-clam with the kind of squash box a vending machine coin slot would be deathly jealous of. And this lady of the evening is no exception, except for...
The Southern Midwest: Some go for the affordable street narcotics. Others, to get a taste of poon that's seen the business-end of an auger more than once. Judging by the context of this homemade video: Our dude is hitting 2 birds with 1 stone.
I'm all for testing boundaries, but caution should be advised if u wanna attempt this yourself. When attempting those special team plays you saw online, it's best to practice up first. PROOF: The $4500 bill I have for buying this. Slightly used.
Never have I seen a man do something so disrespectful with such grace. Where there's shame, he shows honor. Where there's suffering, he brings comfort. And where there's romance, well... he really doesn't GAF, HAHA.
Tina Belcher's safe space gets invaded by some dude taking his mushroom to the park, but accidentally found love instead. Does she: 1) Call da police 2) trade gazpacho recipes or c) take Shia Ladork's advice. This ones easy.
If only he put as much effort in his camera equipment, as he did in forcing volcanic yogurt explosions, maybe we wouldn't be jacking off to Sega CD-quality full motion video right now. Up your game motherfucker.
If anything my tenure in porno has taught me, it's all Asian women a.) squeal like a chipmunk in a blender or b.) hang closer to the knee than Andrew Lloyd Webber. You're just gonna have to 50/50 chance this one.
Being held hostage by a post-op a-hole? Sounds like his birthday came early. That is, until he realizes this culo hits like Mike Tyson on payday. The aroma of quepapas may fade, but the complimentary rhinoplasty is forever.
Ass like Nicki Minaj? Shameless, nude self-promotion on Twitter? The majority of you have already clicked by now, without catching a view of the churro de maricon dangling up front. If you must blame, blame yourself.