What weighs 245lbs, has the lower body of a centaur, and enjoys turning female genitalia into mashed potatoes? This couple's hired gun... and he's not even at full power yet. More unidentifiable rectum sodomy HERE
After banging a good 85% of the Czech Republic's population, he finally broke unfamiliar ground: A mint condition hymen... and an uneducated one at that. She taps out quicker than me during the Baywatch movie.
Her claim to fame is deplorable, and that front seat probably smells like a Chinese cat house. But when the pants come off at 0:34 seconds, her hips look like they can survive giving birth to Danny Devito & its fuckin beautiful.
Okay I lied. Shes neither popular, nor is this a party. Shes Josefina, master of attention whoring & STD aficionado. Moral of the story: Test first, Lick later.
Pregnant sisters, overly-hung midgets and a race to outdo dad's cum stains. I don't know if I'm jerking off to porn, or a Charlie Sheen family reunion.
Ya just got done telling the world your crotch sees more activity than the YMCA... is it really a time for giggles? Sit in a tub of peroxide & think it over.
This is ridiculous. Not lol-ridiculous like a chunk of society identifying as non-binary lesbian attack helicopters. She has zero reaction to being gutted like a sturgeon, and I keep waiting for David Attenborough's explanation.
Dare give your pocket change to a girl with one of these things crammed up her barking walrus, and you'll be rewarded with more shakes than an epileptic with a day pass to Six Flags. SPOILER ALERT: Bitches be faking.
Wife has second thoughts about the butthole boogaloo, right as he's about to shoot some tadpoles at the moon. But there's no escape, she voluntarily submits. In other words: This is a PSA on the importance of communication.
Shame this girl doesn't make videos anymore. A damn crying shame. Never again will we see this level of excitement when it comes to colonizing the brown planet. Today's fap will be followed by a moment of silence. RIP.
My gut instincts tell me this is about as probable as Shia LaBeouf being properly medicated during business hours.. but I do find her full body dry-heaving, and fluid distribution kind of compelling. Thoughts?
If physical pain at all plays a role in the enjoyment a person feels, I would estimate Rocketta Balboa here is hovering in between 'Level 10 Orgasm' and "I got an extra McNugget in my value meal". Ejaculate with caution.
Nothing says 'bust my nut' like teeth broken off at the gum line. She's less than grateful for that flattery, but it's ok. Girls are hotter when they're mad.
If only she put as much effort into her architecture classes, as she did into clappin' clam, maybe she would've thought twice about putting this online.
Believe it or not, cornpocket sodomy is her favorite pastime. That crater has no fear, but 2:05 is where she crossed the line into WIFE MATERIAL. I vow to thee: Hottest Autistic I'd Lose a Custody Battle To. Run with it.
Easily the most deplorable attempt at sexual assault to ever grace my 13" Amiga computer monitor. And that's coming from a man who's seen more than 18 straight minutes of an Adam Sandler movie. My opinion counts.
Average Joes aren't the only ones facing resistance when trying to smash the cadburys. Semi-pro pornstars have occupational hazards too. ah well. As long as human toilet paper isn't on the menu, German girls are still bae.
If ur the kinda dude that can enjoy 10 minutes of nothing but a corporation actually giving back to their customers, this is for you. Don't give a fuck about jigglin C-cup titties? Maybe another video suits your needs better.
