Potato quality footage, daytime gallery shoppers and talks of a Sloppy Benjamin - I'll admit, they had me in the first half. Then I realized she's pornstar Kristy Black.
Only the real ones will remember when this cockamanie goof getting sent to Fuck Town USA was pretty much the most watched porn video in the world. It didn't matter what site you dedicated your cum sock to, it was there. For eternity.
Imagine documenting last nights Smirnoff-inspired gangbang and going viral in two completely different ways at the same time. #herpes #snapchat #effecient
Protip for my ever-evolving female viewer base: If you ever find yourself in this situation, make sure you order the blooming onion first. Outback servers tend to frown upon this kind of behavior out of the gate. Don't ask me how I know.
If you're into the kind of erotica that reminds you of the black market for hackey sacks and burned Blink 182 CD's, you should probably throw them a few bucks.
I'll admit that last clip might be enough to ruin your holiday feast later today. But it's Thanksgiving and you probably need something to talk to grandma about before the sweet potatoes hit the table. You should be thanking me, Mortimer.
Just what in the fuck is actually going on here? Is she green screening her husband with 5 overlays to make it look like the local janitor union is lining up to get their own serving of anal crabs to go? We've reached the peak of technology.
Nearly 20-years-old and still doesn't know how to speak coherently. But what she lacks in basic motor function, she makes up for in grade-A prime meats. i'm sold
Just remembering when Gabbie Carter was the Internet's most wanted. Now, the amount of early aging porn causes has come into question again. [2019] [2021 ] inb4 we witness a union that classifies rectal trauma as a benefits package?
It seems a 2-pack of Bud Light turns you into the Gandolf of parking lot pussy pickups... and today his teachings are all free of charge. Practice what you see here and I promise those, size-11 Tinder girls will never "LMAO" at you again.
Aften Opal. Not a common name you see around these parts. Probably because it sounds like her parents were knee deep in Runescape quests when they came up with it. And much like OSRS, you don't need a big rig to please her. More [HERE]
Look, I understand setting realistic expectations for yourself in life... but maybe we can try to do better than communal ashtray next time? I believe in you.
Not exactly the most unexpected chain of events from a woman that comes less prepared for war than whoevers handicap stall I invaded at Waffle House last week. Sorry Wheels, but the janitor bucket doesn't meet my capacity standard.
Gotta admit, this girl's body alone deserves way more attention than it's getting. Her tits alone are putting the entire SSRI industry on watch. More videos [HERE]
TikTok Porn: These zero effort chicks are about as exciting as an audio book of Alex Jones customizing a footlong at Subway. But throw in a few paywall'd parasocial relationships and suddenly they become a legends in the making.
I'm getting the impression this lady is no stranger to shotgunning a couple servings of Butthole du Jour after a succulent Chinese meal. But hit 88mph, and her brain damages faster than a Discord moderator DM's a bathtub streamer.
Not sure a gap between your eyes wide enough for New York City to charge to park inside of, is on my list of "boner material". But uhh... I'm open to new things.
uhh I'm no expert, but I think it might be time to pack it up and find a safer hobby. Like... collecting Pokemon cards, or maybe building hydrogen bombs for example.
Unfortunately I can't confirm it's authenticity. But it wouldn't be the first time someone filmed their significant other giving the ole dunkachino to a minimum wage stranger, and if 2022 has taught me anything - it will not be the last.
idk what the fuck else to call this, but the amount of naturally occurring meat on that page is too damn high. The look on the second to last girl is a familiar one though. Something that involves hermit crabs, and Bill Cosby's email address.
