Not since walking into an unlocked Red Lobster bathroom at closing time have I seen such disrespect for drug addicts. And just like the rest of the Internet watching, I am disgusted and have an unreasonable craving for buttered biscuits.
Brag about the body count you paid for all you want bruh. If you're not turning all western vaginas into a bowl of Hungry Jack Mashed Potatoes, is it even worth it?
Her tit-to-face ratio is insane. Literally carved right out of the blueprint for "girls I would give up red meat just to be in the same room as one of her brappers after a solo speed run of Olive Garden's Tour of Italy". In other words; I fucks with it.
Face like Billie Eilish
Tits like a GTA create-a-character
Sex drive like she's in a union for ass-eating
Gentleman: Meet your newest reason to get a restraining order.
Kinda off-topic; but whenever this girl pretends she's "getting caught" (every 13 seconds), her face instantly scrunches up and transforms into Michael Cera. Proof @ the 2:59 mark. Direct all body fluids accordingly. p.s. nice mother fucking tits.
In what seems to be an effort to ultimately rent her asshole out as an airport hangar, siswet has once again pushed the envelope on what is considered 'regular rectology'. This time, taking Keemstar straight into the promised land.
The sequel in one website's crusade to help the world with an unspoken problem. The Machine is back, and this time; no cornhole will be spared. 1st VIDEO HERE
This is standard im having a midlife crisis so I'm gonna Photoshop the shit out of my tits and make an IG account syndrome. Fortunately, the Internet has given us the gift of social media to watch the eventual jump into Walmart parking lot porn.
#nostalgia Just scroll to 1:22 and remember what it was like when the only thing that mattered in life was how low you could get your ping on a 56k modem, and your stock of BAWLS GAMER JUICE. Truly a simpler time for a simpler world.
Rebecca's first time in Stinktown USA proves memorable. For the guy trying to double-dip, not her. Binging Dr. Phil episodes is going to erase this memory faster than me getting permabanned from Home Depot for stress testing toilet displays.
Ever find yourself asking the question: What would happen if you spiked Freddy Kreuger's Ambien with boner pills, let Michael Myers into a glory hole and told Jason Voorhees that teenage pussy has a better use than pitchfork storage?
You can go ahead and brag about your 14 inches of lethal force all you want bruh. If you're not using it to turn all white vaginas into a bowl of Bob Evans Mashed Potatoes, it's about as useful as a hot shower is to this mentally stable female.
And by shocked I mean quietly contemplating how far into insanity social media and attention whoring has pushed society. Crazyshit.com makes these Efukt-ish videos regularly and they officially changed my life for the worse. More [HERE]
Her name is "Alisonfire" but I prefer the moniker "reason I have to buy 2-ply toilet paper in bulk". Fun Fact #1: She's famous for making the world wait half a decade for wiener-on-vag action. Fun Fact #2: 173,000 of her Pornhub views are from me.
You just can't go back after this. She'll forever be known as the super THOT of Bumblefuck Alabama. She's essentially a walking, twitching Reddit activist for open sexuality... yet stays in good spirit knowing this vid is going straight to IG.
Call her what you will: Gianna Dior, Divine Box... I prefer the moniker "the reason I have to apply aloe vera to my penis every 3-5 hours". Never before has a pornstar made me proud of the reward points I earned shopping exclusively at Walgreens.
