Seems this B-tier porn LARPer has acquired some sort of certification from the city? Back in my day this jobber would have laid down for the 3 count without a gimmick and put the legend over. And dammit, she would have liked it. (brother)
This one is for the homies that asked me wtf happened to that girl who looks like Sarah Palin crossbreed her with a gerbil? As fate would have it, not even a pandemic slowed down her quest to hate cum on a budget. Yikes and gadzooks.
I was gonna comment on her looking like Wish.com Bella Poarch. Then got sidelined by her cranking his cock like a Tug-o-War with King fuckin Kong. Lady, free tip: It's not the GenericWhoreMeUp line at Sephora. There are limits here.
This lady has a condition known as "fucking gullible". It's what happens when dad stops loving you before your 1st year of college, so you seek the refuge of alpha males that tenderize you like a $2.00 shank of London Broil. Manager's special.
Not since walking into an unlocked Red Lobster bathroom at closing time have I seen such disrespect for drug addicts. And just like the rest of the Internet watching, I am disgusted and have an unreasonable craving for buttered biscuits.
I don't know man. Is this really what passes for must-have e-celebrity content that people are willing to pay for? Call me a traditionalist, but back in my day our sex tapes actually had sex in them. And piss jugs. Never forget the piss jugs.
Well damn, if the first 30 seconds of this video didn't confirm Smash Bros being a fighting game then I don't know what to tell you. The tech of a ballsac that's unblockable on wakeup basically confirms everything you don't want to admit.
Apparently these psycho soviets were keeping a legit sex slave, and documenting the entire thing via a Pornhub profile which was wiped clean. But it's the Internet so... nothing is gone forever. Except maybe her definition of "rim jobs" (you'll see)
This is standard middle-aged woman for "I saw a college girl do this on Instagram once so I can do it too" syndrome. Fortunately science has gifted us the video footage to accompany this lifelong stigma that can never be washed off. #facts
As fate would have it, not even a grim reaper of a pandemic can slow down a girls quest for Internet notoriety and Instagram followers. But as for the spectator in the last video? I think she just reinforced her sanitizing regime beyond Covid 19.
I can't imagine what else the BFF in question has been forced to spectate in the past. But I'm betting it involves the neighbor's cat and all 12 flavors of Rice-a-Roni.
The setup is fake. Being hung like one of those fucking things from Attack on Titan is not. Someone better prepare the ice bath for Ava Dalush - It just might starve off some of the nerve damage her uterus is dealing with now. And forever.
See that smile? I know that smile. That's the "I got 15 minutes to kill before Anthropologie needs me to mark up prices on the pinecone enema kits so let's make it quick" smile. The things you absorb after living in NYC for > 23 days.
All I learned from this is a 2-pack of Coors Light gives all the confidence someone needs to perform in public. And today, all that education is free. Practice what you see here & I promise those size-11 Craigslist girls will never "LMAO" at you again.
When the ass is this level of quality, ur little "iz just a prank br0" turns into "2nd degree felony assault" pretty damn fast. Thats your lesson for the day, TikTok'rs.
Speculation time: Misogynist? Eccentric fetish? The mating ritual of the Monarch Southern Californian? We may never know the answer, but one thing is certain: His verbal assault would have landed a 6-figure comedy special from HBO in 1998.
Not exactly building an impressive resume when 2 1/2 inches of Alabama's finest sends you running for the Neosporin. This might interfere with her five year plan.
