A classic moment from the archives of Elay Smith. A woman that single-handedly set the ground work for future OnlyFan'ers by making a habit out of terrorizing her neighbors with nothing more than autistic facial expressions & double-G tits.
If facial expressions tell a story, I'd say this hog hopper just blasted through the entire Lord of The Rings trilogy and got halfway into the spinoffs in less time than it takes to shit myself after Panda Express egg rolls. (also known as: warp speed)
The story may be 10lbs of bullshit. But at least it's employment bullshit and not inter-family uncle dad father dishwasher bullshit. That's real progress. [MiaKink]
Especially if u aren't stone cold sober during daylight hours. One wrong angle and you run the risk of turning her innie into an outtie. It's called "the heat seeking carmel farmer" and it's the #3 reason for divorce, right behind finances & Reddit.
Eyes like Steve Buscemi, squirts like a fire hydrant and looks like the all-Klonopin diet is holding on for dear life. In other words; You will never be this erect again.
More use of a fish eye lens than a Bam Margera skateboard compilation and exceptional proportions have manifested in the greatest compliment our boy has gotten since the glory days of Yahoo chat. Life can only go down from here.
Good luck catching a glimpse of tier-A poon like this around the corner from Pizza Hut express. It might be time for me to dust off the ole passport and start getting that cultural diversity CNN is screeching about. [MORE OF HER HERE]
Pretty decent. You'd probably give up the last half of your Costco chicken bake if she could teach your girlfriend how to do this without a handle of Smirnoff first.
Getting to this level of comfortable may actually end up being a bad thing. Today it's hawkin Detroit's finest unwashed hamlog in front of a friendly bystander. Tomorrow, it's using city fire hydrants as portable enemas. Ask me how I know.
A few q's if you don't mind: What the fuck is this? Above average production value? Method acting? And most importantly, if I go through Comcast training, will I be able to fix this Internet faster than getting through to customer service?
The Nintendo Switch is a hybrid video game console, consisting of a console unit, a dock, and two Joy-Con controllers. Although it is a hybrid console, Nintendo classifies it as "a home console that you can take with you on the go".
23 years of positive thinking and rectal (in)tolerance have manifested themselves in a mint condition 2024 episode of live webcam failures, goofs and all around chucklefuck situations that probably didn't transpire as originally expected...
A stark contrast between this and your everyday HOA Karen. This one actually finishes you off after flappin her gums in your backyard for 27 uninvited minutes.
Yeah I know she's not in a PF location during this video, but one would have to assume this kind of behavior would get you a coast-to-coast ban. They seem to have a very high intolerance for sexual behavior and lifting weights above 50lbs.
This is pretty standard 'i drank 2 whole Coronas at once and had sex with a house plant' plot lines. But our lead actress still has some explaining to do. [more here]
uhh I don't know what the fuck is going on in that last clip, but it seems like a reasonable solution for men that willingly choose the all beer and cabbage diet. And that special group of people that treat galaxy gas like a major food group.
Non-existent respect for other's property, and enough PSI to degrease the engine of a Toyota Corolla. Normally a combination worthy of being proud of, now actually looks pretty fuckin abhorrent in retrospect. Hit the showers immediately.