Maybe it's the 2021 meta, but imagine going from freebasing homemade tartar sauce from Paula Deen's family style recipe book... to getting e-grounded by Twitch for blueballing Minecraft SIMPS rofl. #neversubbed #neverdonated
Face like Billie Eilish
Tits like a GTA create-a-character
Sex drive like she's in a union for ass-eating
Gentleman: Meet your newest reason to get a restraining order.
Short list of things I value in life: Cottonelle Ultra Comfort Care and dedicated females like this one in particular. Tack on the fact that she can handle more wang than a Chinese phone book and we may be talking literal perfection here.
Nearly 21-years-old and still doesn't know how to lock a door. But what she lacks in basic logic, she makes up for in grade-AA prime meat - full rack. And for just $100 in donations per day, you can mod her chatroom around the clock. #2021
Flattery was never my strong point... and it still isn't. Why do I get the vibe she bathes in hot dog water after being force fed off the Burger King dollar menu?
Apologies in advance for the misleading thumbnail. I just wanted to make sure we're all on the same page when it comes to defininig the word "titties" and how they should look as little like the ramp Tony Hawk hit his last Ollie 540 on.
Midgets, Sex toys sponsored by Tim Allen and incestual blowjobs from a parallel dimension. I don't know if this is a video, or 4chan fever dream. More vids HERE
If South America is any indication of social distancing bailing us out of the worst pandemic of our lifetime... I'd say this is proof we are buttfucked.
She's not exactly equipped with the poker face of Clint Eastwood. So when the "i dont think that was a fart" reaction washes over her, u know it's 100% authentic.
Somewhere (Germany) there must exist an OSHA violations video that involves a hydraulic press and whatever's left of this guys hammerhead of a chode. #betonit
Another entry for the museum of unintentional rectal breaching. 3.5 mins of backdoor bruising that white people should only experience inside the CHAZ zone. Only diff is the people in this vid actually put meat inside their bodies lol.
I'll leave you with some wisdom my acquaintance at Taco Bell bestowed upon me: Never underestimate a woman's will to feed. She might have the phenotype of a Midwest soccer mom... but when the adrenaline hits, watch the fuck out.
18-years-old and barely know what a clitoris is. But in this world, all that matters is the size of your churro... and proportionately speaking, dude got a THICC one. Emphasis on proportions. Looks like a banana glued to a mother fuckin toothpick.
Only one thing compliments the smooth stylings of a committed relationship; And that's getting more bang for your buck. As long as your GF's bestie circle does not go beyond the Walmart parking lot, ya dun gonna have good times.
It's kinda refreshing to see that tourism is still booming for our brothers below the equator. Now let's go ahead and get these gentleman under contract for the next Ghostbusters reboot. I'm seeing at least 103 inches of Oscar winners here.
Self-proclaimed "flat chested stripper" loses total control of herself somewhere between the 47th and 90th uppercut to her cervix. Obviously this is an attempt to break into acting. @midol we may have just stumbled upon your new poster girl.
