See that ripped-as-fuck bromaster over there? All those roids shrunk his testicles into pistachio nuts... so he's not exactly fit for a Peter North-esque facial. Time for Plan B - Jergens. Lots and lots of Jergens.
Sloppy pervert pays the price for using bulky, outdated equipment. His victim quickly takes notice and stomps everything to shit. That's what you get for shopping @ Radioshack in the 21st century, you dumb fuck.
Her cornhole is the size of that Guatemalan sinkhole and she just scarfed down a #5 at Taco Bell. You know that ride "Free Fall" at Magic Mountain? Lets just say it bares a few striking similarities to this chick's colon.
Computer genius yearning to fuck a sub-400 pound woman manages to bribe a Hooter's waitress into sleeping over. $2300 and 5 hits of crack nets him the best 30 seconds of his life.
Cute teen with gothic undertones and a mean set of dicksucking skills goes to town on her BF's 7 incher. Unfortunately her enthusiastic blowjob comes to a halt after a minor instance of projectile vomit. That'll do it!
Remember that bitch from one of the select few episodes of Maury that didnt involve teeangers having sex in exchange for cheeseburgers? She had this crazy ability to pop her eyes out of their sockets, Total Recall style. Well, it appears she reproduced.
I've seen this turd in a few vids now. Same shit every time. He poses as a potential customer.. but in reality.. he's just buying some time to beat off and talk dirty with a member of the opposite sex. Ballin on a budget.
Malaysian hooker foolishly assumes her objective is complete and exerts a sigh of relief... only to be shot point blank with yet another wad of Joseppi's finest. The element of surprise has never been more erotic.
Cute Russian girl sucks a cock fresh outta the rectal oven and gets a little more than she bargained for. I'm talking fecal residue, right on the tongue. Good times.
Talking into gaping assholes, hearing your echo... sure looks like fun but I'm betting the smile fades once catch a whiff of the cheese enchilada and frijoless that's on it's way out. Know what I mean dawg?
Big tittied slutty gets introduced to the pains of anal sex. Miraculously, she seems to enjoy it. Those are some killer knockers lady... please ditch the Ellen Degeneres hairdo though.
Cute pornstar nearly vomits after getting a taste of her partners alfredo sauce. Bitch needs to quit tripping and learn to savor the condiments of life.
He's got a fat gut, a huge Arnie tattoo and any time his wife chows down on too many Twinkys, he fucks her throat till she pukes em all up. This dude has class.
Pay close attention and you'll notice that that's not jizz being unloaded on to her face. It's lotion. Some dumb fuck standing aside the cameraman is flinging it at her lol. Porno magic baby.
In between her jew nose and his tootsie roll of a cock... I gotta ask... how the fuck did they expect anyone to get off to this? It's like the Wicked Witch meets Mini Me.
Can't say it's the first time I've seen a yellow Squash misued as a sexual aid but that's definitely one of the bigger ones. Perhaps she's prepping for a certain farm animal too?
Dude gets called over to a changing room to assist a random slutty with her bikini. After she briefly leaves, he relishes the moment and starts beating off while the smell of her cunt is still in the air. You da man.
