28 semesters of Botswanian dance theory paid for, and this is how you return the favor, Becky? You are now a disgrace to the once great town of Ballbag, Arkansas.
Replace "sister with "myself" and "surprised" with "initiating a level 4 code red biohazard" and this bathroom video suddenly becomes relatable. Side Note: Never trust the color green at a Mexican restaurant. There is no happy endings.
Today we learn three crucial things, so grab your colored pencils and pay attention: #1: Voyeurism is alive and well #2: Sexual misconduct is always negotiable. And #3: Lifetime bans from Macy's aren't a big deal. Lets get it.
Things I've watched until the end: [1] All 67 volumes of SSBBW Ivy and Friends [2] The Star Wars Holiday Special [3] Game of Thrones Season 8. Things that have made me tap out instantly: [1] This [2] This video [3] This mother fucking video.
This one is for the homies that asked me wtf happened to that girl who looks like Sarah Palin crossbreed her with a gerbil? As fate would have it, not even a pandemic slowed down her quest to hate cum on a budget. Yikes and gadzooks.
I mean, blemishing a clean criminal record with multiple counts of exposing your barking walrus to complete strangers in public. The short answer? Yes. [original]
Don't blame him. This 'once in a lifetime event'occurs more often than my toilet flushes after a McDonald's breakfast. Fuse that with her mouth breather-husband filming this despicable ordeal, and your climax is officially cancelled muchachos.
This lady has a condition known as "fucking gullible". It's what happens when dad stops loving you before your 1st year of college, so you seek the refuge of alpha males that tenderize you like a $2.00 shank of London Broil. Manager's special.
2 parts mystery, 18 parts boner food. The bafflement begins about halfway into scrolling downward, when you realize these cornholios are too polished to have experienced chimichanga nite after dancing with Jack Daniels and Jim Beam.
You don't have to be a full Chad to experience this kind of public salami sloshing. Just find a girl that's sexually attracted to Amibos and the lifetime bans from all major airlines will flow in faster than you can complain about them on Twitter.
Today we learn three crucial things, so grab your colored pencils and pay attention: #1: Voyeurism is alive and well #2: Sexual misconduct is always negotiable. And #3: Lifetime bans from Macy's aren't a big deal. Lets get it.
I can't imagine what else the BFF in question has been forced to spectate in the past. But I'm betting it involves the neighbor's cat and all 12 flavors of Rice-a-Roni.
The setup is fake. Being hung like one of those fucking things from Attack on Titan is not. Someone better prepare the ice bath for Ava Dalush - It just might starve off some of the nerve damage her uterus is dealing with now. And forever.
See that smile? I know that smile. That's the "I got 15 minutes to kill before Anthropologie needs me to mark up prices on the pinecone enema kits so let's make it quick" smile. The things you absorb after living in NYC for > 23 days.
Is there some sort of correlation between popular girls with SIMP armies and sex acts less interesting than Betty White getting 15 unsupervised minutes with a lawn sprinkler? These hype machines never seem to deliver. Prove me wrong?
All I learned from this is a 2-pack of Coors Light gives all the confidence someone needs to perform in public. And today, all that education is free. Practice what you see here & I promise those size-11 Craigslist girls will never "LMAO" at you again.