This is why u always round up your CVS bill to the next dollar. In the words of the world's greatest philosopher: “Whatever it takes to save the earth, 'cause granola girls, gets 'em all moist. Homeless girls too. They'll do anything for shelter." - CB
Taps out after 40 seconds of anal and can't take a cumshot without coughing up this morning's corn pops? Afraid that puts u on my no-fap blacklist. Somewhere between Joe Rogans podcast & the final episode of The Golden Girls. #standards
Seems like a nice girl. The type that'd throw herself off a building if you missed a text, or cheat on you if your Instagram post got zero likes. But her enthusiasm? I've seen happier faces cleaning the handicap toilets at Renaissance Fairs. Pass.
Those deflated pigskins look pretty rough for a 20-something year old and the rest of her collection screams Double Wide Pride. Free tip m'lady; Spend less money on the "I NEED CUM" rubber stamps, and more on a fucking vacuum.
Public restrooms + stepping in unidentified fluids. Not exactly the most shocking combination. But I'll say this; Those tits are marvelous. Just big enough to become an OnlyFans millionaire, not big enough to create another Hulk Hogan hate crime.
Had to look up our guide to stranger danger because I couldn't remember the last time I saw her put new content out. It seems she quit a while back, and that's a shame. Those Tinder videos she was making were borderline medical journals.
Seems pretty predictable to me. One has the hairstyle of a GTA prostitue, and the other is living her monthly YOLO moment. Anxiety (and chlamydia) should be expected after the cinnamon twist fuck chicken brothers finish bustin their nuts.
Today's menu? Uninsurable throat damage, the strongest rectum in Texas, more chain mail than Scott Steiner's closet, a recipe banned from 78% of Gordon Ramsay's restaurants and an erection even Penn and Teller can't explain to you.
And by "unexplainable" I mean still getting nonsense words like stepsister in our carrot smack catalogue. It's almost 2023, we need a more interesting dynamic. May I suggest United States postman, or the mop bucket at the 7-11 for example.
The blurring of lines between snorkeling and female independence as illustrated by a sex act that's lead to more adult diapers than In n' Out's Animal Style. Never before has adult entertainment made me prouder of my Walmart reward points.
Normally this kind of attempt at public depravity would be immediately thrown into the compost pile for wasting our time. But I'm told this lunatic is legit, and has a history of freebasing randoms along her journey. Big rofl @ the 1:33 mark.
Potato quality footage, daytime gallery shoppers and talks of a Sloppy Benjamin - I'll admit, they had me in the first half. Then I realized she's pornstar Kristy Black.
Just a tip: When the butthole is tight enough to take your blood pressure, a little pregame ritual might be wise. She's Bella Gray and anorexic gerbils probably produce more waste volume than she does with that trash compactor of a b-hole.
It seems a 2-pack of Bud Light turns you into the Gandolf of parking lot pussy pickups... and today his teachings are all free of charge. Practice what you see here and I promise those, size-11 Tinder girls will never "LMAO" at you again.
Sorry hungry peasants trapped under the inflation line. It seems all that lab meat has been diverted. Now if you'll excuse me... I have to watch Interstellar again.
She claims this is legit, and it's the first time "meeting" this dude. Okay lady, sure. And the gangrene I got from "introducing" myself to a stripper that considers Canadian pennies a form of payment will just go away with soap and water.
Gotta admit; I like her look. It screams "i lived in a trailer park, but my dad let me drive the trans-am to school so that was cool". Get her fit ifuckedmycousin.com
Not the plan of attack I recommend you try on the misses. But when you're Mimi Cica, anything that doesn't run on a turbo diesel engine seems to be fair game...
Awesome tits. Outgoing personality. Decent depth perception. 9/10, would subject my sacred Taylor Swift edition cumsock to all 6 seconds of this again.
