A beautiful face can redeem just about anything - bad breath, small tits, crooked teeth, type 2 genital herpes. But THIS chick.... she's got a booty like Conan the Barbarian and I don't know whether to run or rim.
He watches his own daughter's porn films, but it's okay guys. The daughter sums it up best: "my daddy has a really big penis, and if he got turned on by my movies, I would know. Trust me". Excellent benchmark, m'lady.
Okay she's no Ellen Page, but what she lacks in fame & forehead, she makes up for in... well, actually nothing. This girl is literally fucking useless. She kills the scene at the 5.05 mark and I have zero idea why.
She's 6 months preggo and has an ass-2-waist ratio that'd make Kim Kardashian soil her Gucci g-string in jealousy. She's also in need of an orgasm. Badly. Skip to the .40 mark for sexual failure at it's finest.
The head of a Hitachi is shaped like a doorknob. READ: not something you stick up your asshole. But when you have Brazilian butt implants and a $11 spray-on tan, a prolapse isn't a concern. It's destiny.
He's twice her age, sports a level 10 pedostache and drives a 93' Suzuki, Rapevan Edition. Most girls would fear for their lives. But her? The dripping wet twat speaks for itself: slosh slosh slosh slosh slosh slosh.
Deadbeat mom zones out the screams of her special-needs son so that she can focus on far more important matters, I.E. giving some random a handjob (and a dismal one at that). Mediocre parent, mediocre slut.
2 A.M. booty call goes from sensuous to fuck my life as DeAndre DeDouche repeatedly slides his butterfinger into no-mans-land: her acne-ridden, possibly-virgin asshole. She cries. He laughs. I bookmark.
Fresh out of highschool and new to the slut scene, this little brat whines herself straight into unemployment after deciding she cant/wont do BJ's. No worries you beautiful bitch, I gotcha covered: careers.walmart.com
Her pussy is perma-gaped and that b-hole contains more roids than Sylvester Stallone's medicine cabinet, but when she starts cumming @ the 1.47 mark, her genitals do the Macarena and it's fucking beautiful.
She's built like Despicable Me, and dude's shorter than the closet twink from Hunger Games. It's a sexual miscombination, and it's one that goes from moderately bad to fucking ewwwww! very quickly. (1 min. mark)
This girl is special. Her face says "I shop at Trader Joes and dance to Harry Potter-inspired techno music" but from the neck down she has the body of a pornstar. Oh.. and she masturbates in front of mom. #marryme.
Chuck & Buck combine penile forces and quite literally fuck the basic motor function out of this washed up skank biscuit. The mere suggestion of resuming intercourse frightens her (2.50 mark). #GrabTheJergens
and a beautiful face. and amazing tits. But how about the personality? Probably less depth than a gerbil's vagina. I like you, I'll pleasure myself to you, but the pedestal remains reserved for Veronica Mars.
The face of a ladyboy, tummy of Tara Reid, and a
rear-end that only a visually impaired African American could love. Okay, that was mean. I do look forward to seeing you in the XXX remake of Elephant Man though.
Interesting surname. Was it chosen out of love for the search engine... or the busboy at the Panda Express where she clearly binge ate chicken chow mein tridaily? Scroll down, watch last video and you'll understand.
Genius idea, poor execution. People want to see a petite Hispanic with a greasy asshole ride that bike through a swap meet. Not Ned Flanders in Fuckstick, Tennessee. Now apologize to your Walmart denim.
$4 and a zip folder of sexually suggestive photos of House M.D. says this dude gets recognized. Sorry friend, the glory days of you wearing your daughters underwear as a Mexican wrestling mask are over.
and by 'gangbang' I mean one sexually inept man losing his virginity while Carlos Mencia's 72 cousins spectate. The only thing missing is a Mariachi band and one token black guy repeatedly screaming "worldstar".
Apparently this is Bailey Jay, the Vita Don Teese of chicks w/ dicks. I'm not so sure. Some will look at this and see a beautiful shemale, all I see is that goofy fuck from Saving Silverman.
