If proportions at all play a role in the size of a man's cock, I'd guesstimate this little honcho is packing something in between a Jolly Rancher and a dinner mint. And yet he still lays pipe like a stud. RESPECT.
A turd cutter with pussy lips. Carl Sagan called it metaphysically impossible. David Attenborough wrote it off as an urban legend. Well, today I stand before you with proof. The labia majora de poopchute is REAL.
She's trying to get off with one of those rubber cocks that have suction cups at the base. They're supposed to be good for hands-free fun but this broad's clam is so tight that the dildo wont stay put. Kinda hot.
See that ripped-as-fuck bromaster over there? All those roids shrunk his testicles into pistachio nuts... so he's not exactly fit for a Peter North-esque facial. Time for Plan B - Jergens. Lots and lots of Jergens.
Sloppy pervert pays the price for using bulky, outdated equipment. His victim quickly takes notice and stomps everything to shit. That's what you get for shopping @ Radioshack in the 21st century, you dumb fuck.
Her cornhole is the size of that Guatemalan sinkhole and she just scarfed down a #5 at Taco Bell. You know that ride "Free Fall" at Magic Mountain? Lets just say it bares a few striking similarities to this chick's colon.
There's no coming back from something like this. Her twat will be forever agape. The chronic queefing has already set in. She's essentially a walking, talking whoopie cusion and yet she remains in good spirits. I like that in a whore.
Computer genius yearning to fuck a sub-400 pound woman manages to bribe a Hooter's waitress into sleeping over. $2300 and 5 hits of crack nets him the best 30 seconds of his life.
Deepthroat gone awry, she upchucks all over floor.. soiling one, possibly even two motel 6 pillow sheets. The man responsible issues a few words of comfort - "you puking whore, you puked". True love.
The unwritten rules of a nude beach: a.) see with your eyes, not your hands b.) travel in packs, you'll feel like less of a douchebag and c.) always bury your jizz. Common courtesy bro.
Remember that bitch from one of the select few episodes of Maury that didnt involve teeangers having sex in exchange for cheeseburgers? She had this crazy ability to pop her eyes out of their sockets, Total Recall style. Well, it appears she reproduced.
Check the last 5 seconds of this video. His penis looks like something off the menu of Wetzel's Pretzel. And yet he fucks on, completely unphased by the penile fracture. I crown thee Techno Viking of sexual intercourse.
I've seen this turd in a few vids now. Same shit every time. He poses as a potential customer.. but in reality.. he's just buying some time to beat off and talk dirty with a member of the opposite sex. Ballin on a budget.
Malaysian hooker foolishly assumes her objective is complete and exerts a sigh of relief... only to be shot point blank with yet another wad of Joseppi's finest. The element of surprise has never been more erotic.
Her twat is blood red and more shriveled than the cock of an Eskimo. For god sakes, what member of the animal kingdom did you fuck? And more importantly, how big was it's penis?
Take a petite white bitch and equip her with the best features of a black woman (huge ass and uhhh... yeah, kinda short list) and this is what you get. Fuckin fap.
Talking into gaping assholes, hearing your echo... sure looks like fun but I'm betting the smile fades once catch a whiff of the cheese enchilada and frijoless that's on it's way out. Know what I mean dawg?
