Some women need a good meal and a goodnight text to reach their sexual peak. But this one? Just one half-assed request has her pastrami butterfly goopafied. Not a single phone in sight. Just 2 people living in the moment. I kinda respect it.
The real hero of today's adventure should be whatever surgeon sews that bag of expired beef back together in the last clip. It seems learning how to be a boxer through YouTube videos with a language barrier has consequences. More [here]
First warning sign should have been suggesting Ziploc Big Bags as contraceptive. The 2nd was needing to pay for a day pass in order to enter the donkey exhibit.
Turns out using your velvet buzzsaw as a communal carpet cleaner isn't offensive to everybody. Let this be definitive proof that testosterone still exists in the world.
Just what the fuck was going on in 2006? Looks like someone with a gestapo fetish and a sizable bankroll started to bring his fever dream Lexapro overdose fantasy to life. Today's delusion? A possible look at UBER in it's group test phase.
Nothing gets a 40-something moist quite like BOGO sales at their local Target. Couple that with 2008's finest fashion choices and you got a recipe for the craziest future Facebook chain posts. Mall parking lots will never be the same.
Maybe zero is a harsh criticism. We all have to start somewhere. It's just that most recipients of the Gawkoluxious 3000 would prefer making it out of the tutorial 1st.
Hey maybe this is your thing, and so be it if it is. I just want to make sure we're all on the same page when it comes to buying modern day remakes and how they should involve as many bodily fluids as possible. Always shop smart. Shop S-Mart.
5 foot 3, weighs less than a soggy bag of Thanksgiving leftovers and literally can't keep a penis out of her mouth for 19 consecutive seconds. No it's not whoever smoked your ass in that last Arc Raiders game -- It's gotta be kane [mira monroe]
Looks like a one and done because I've never seen another video of her before. Which is a damn crying shame. The consequential followup of her getting samoan dropped inside a Del Taco handicap stall would've been worth the wait.
The true downside of marrying prostitutes from russiabride.com? Every wiener in a three-mile radius is using your 9-5 to unload some nut sac gazpacho on your significant other And don't even get me started on the ridiculous storage fees.
This is what happens when Chaturbate gets saturated w/ day-ones and you have to find new ways to scalp juicer tokens. All because a taxi driver from Tanzania can't stop maxing out his data so he can tell asiangirl8537 to "show anal & borb".
I'm getting the impression this lady is no stranger to shotgunning a couple servings of Butthole du Jour after a succulent Chinese meal. But hit 88mph, and she calls more timeouts than a Discord moderator walking up a flight of stairs.
Normally this kind of attempt at public depravity would be immediately thrown into the compost pile for wasting our time. But I'm told this lunatic is legit, and has a history of freebasing randoms along her journey. Big rofl @ the 1:33 mark.
1 part hypebeast, 19 parts herpes simplex two. Surely my user base doesn't need a PSA on the reasons not to raw dog a girl that considers Fruit Stripe gum a luxury item. But just in case I've given too much credence, do not try this one at home.
