Requesting $14.00 for a cup of pre-burnt plastic coffee beans from the jungles of Madagascarfuckyourself rly should come w/ a point card that redeems this prize.
Lack of stigmas aside- who the fuck is walking around town in an emblazoned pornhub bomber jacket? Surely there are better skins available? DLC perhaps?
If only the avg girl put this much effort into carving out an a-hole that belongs in a museum, maybe I wouldn't be talking to a therapist about my sexual attraction to Reese's peanut butter cups this weekend. E-books will be written about this.
Imagine coming home during the witching hour only to find your significant other kneeling down, thorax-deep on Jamal's chopped cheese. (The Harlem original)
Her [entire account] is bizarre imo. She clearly has an affinity for being POV-defiled inside the mudd trumpet but can't be arsed to spend more than $14.oo (USD) on a better quality camera. Black Friday Pofegistka, mark your calendar.
Stewart and his local Dungeons and Dragons chapter approach your wife with their war drums out, looking for an impromptu handicap match. What do you do?
Started at the bottom, now we're here. And by here I mean vigorously being tested for sexually transmitted diseases because Derrick from the Walmart parking lot insisted on not using any form of protection during his big moment.
These kinds of facial reactions are normally produced only after learning the art of kung fu fornications such as the testicle thunderstorm or the disgruntled rhinoceros. In other words don't attempt on those with weak immune systems.
Getting blown out within shouting distance of your HOA'd neighbors is a pretty bold move. Actually, it's one of superiority. Nancy and her 13 cats will most definitely think twice about filing a noise complaint at the next board meeting.
If everybody is born with a gift, hers is performing acts of infidelity without as much as a trace of last night's double serving of guacamole streaked onto the finest imported vegan leather. That's gotta be worth something to somebody.
Naturally attractive without modifying her ass cheeks with Fix-a-flat at the local NAPA Auto Parts and has the skill to back it up? I predict your title is a lie, sir.
If only the avg girl put this much effort into carving out an a-hole that belongs in a museum, maybe I wouldn't be talking to a therapist about my sexual attraction to Reese's peanut butter cups this weekend. E-books will be written about this.
Seems nice. The type that'd cook artisanal Beefaroni on the 1st date or volunteer a BJ when ur TikTok gets 20 views. Men want that. They rly do. But not like this.
She looks like a sweet girl. The kinda woman that would have a homemade bowl of Gaspacho ready for you after a long day of work. Anyway [heres] her chowing down on this dudes bag like its hiding grammas old fashioned marmalade recipe.
Believe it or not this was actually voted the number two reason to wake up Saturday morning with an unexplained rash in between your ass cheeks. Only falling short to raw dogging Taco Bell's new Cantina Chicken Mexican Pizza.
Looks like Sparky splurged all of his birthday nickles on the supreme package. She's built, looks like she enjoys it and judging by his lack of gagging, there's no aroma of yesterday's Newports anywhere to be seen. The glass ceiling is broken.
Her act of defiance is almost as egregious has having the gall to upload a video with more pixelation than a Commodore 64 that survived a house fire. Sickening.
Velma Gigglebush may look like a non-threat, but don't let it fool you. Behind those bifocals and semi-sanitized vajeen exists a girl that would power fuck your boyfriend/husband/mazda miata if given 3 consecutive unsupervised mins alone.
Imagine all the planning, text messages, sneaking around and poker face horse shit she went through only to find out Sanjeet has the endurance of a geriatric garden snail. You can almost pinpoint the moment of her final disappointment.
She may be all giggles and Valtrex right now, but the 3:00AM smile will soon fade once Becky Smackapuss gets the dry cleaning bill for that Target linen. #doomed
