"if you're caught, DON'T STOP!" That's not a direct quote or anything. And it probably shouldn't be one. Especially for that broken fire hydrant seasoning the corner table at Smash Burger around the 5:00 mark. wtf is wrong with u people?
Seems nice. The type that'd cook artisanal Beefaroni on the 1st date or volunteer a BJ when ur TikTok gets 20 views. Men want that. They rly do. But not like this.
idk what kind of Amish paradise rules they agreed to before making the match, but this shit doesn't work for me brother. Interesting loophole though. It's kind of like tax harvesting, where the people watching are the only ones getting fucked.
Becky McSnagglepuss channels her inner sorority girl to give Alfonso and friends a one-time look at the kind of minge that requires double vaccination. #tourism
Turns out this inter-gender tag team have discovered a new meta to pollute the pages of xvideos with: Simulated "oops all anal" videos. More tomfoolery [here]
I get the "i gOtTa MaKe SuRe tHe ThUmbNaiL hAs tO lOoK LiKe i hAvE BRaIn dAmaGe" bullshit, but could you have spared us the fucking HVAC tape across her mouth? I'd like to keep my erection as far away from Home Depot as possible.
Like the thunderdome, a Woody casting means two enter but only 1 leaves with a working sphincter. The following rush to Costco's adult diaper section is usually a dark day in the victim's life... but not today. Double BOOM. Double DOOM. [more]
Normally it takes an incestuous story line and at least a $20 gift card to Starbucks to get Aubry Babcock on the wet end of an average penis. But today is SPECIAL.
18 semesters of Namibian dance theory paid, and this is how you return the favor to ur parents, Becky? u r a disgrace to the once great town of Ballbag, Nebraska.
Gotta respect a man that can make a white girl stop in her tracks faster than a Target clearance sale by simply removing his Nike Dri-FITs, and hangin' brain.
Believe it or not this was actually voted the number two reason to wake up Saturday morning with an unexplained rash in between your ass cheeks. Only falling short to raw dogging Taco Bell's new Cantina Chicken Mexican Pizza.
Tinder is integrating AI to reduce "swipe fatigue" and enhance user experience through personalized matching and improved safety. Key features will include "Chemistry" (AI-driven daily recommendations based on persona/photo analysis)
We're talking first OF video here, not first time breaking the seal on her unmarinated waffle stomped shit biscuit. While it still maintains spry elasticity, I'll bet dollars to donuts it has more miles on it than grandads prized El Camino.
Downside to living with a depraved girl from Frogballs Arkansas? Every time you get half a hard-on, it's time to perform. But the produce is usually fresh so... win.
Turning a non-Snorlax into wifey, only to find out she's been doing THIS while you're on the clock. Literally a top 3 reason amphetamines are so popular again.
If you're the kind of gentleman that prides himself on enjoying the finer things in life (Little Caesars $7 carry outs, director cuts of Nicholas Cage independent movies etc.) then this set of generational milkers is sure to win your little heart.
"Attention whoring" is a slang term for someone who constantly seeks validation, often using provocative, dramatic, or inappropriate tactics. It typically stems from deep-rooted issues like low self-esteem, loneliness or unfulfilled ego. -Wikipedia
The more cringe the girl, the further they have to go for attention. A simple concept officially reinforced by this 97lbs of solid Slavic skankarooni. I'll put it this way: watching this forced me to drink Kettle One again. It's that kinda Caucasity.
Not her first rodeo. Real ball-knowers have seen this mongrel practically drown herself in unknown BBC way before OF was a thing. Just the love of the game.
Just the thought of this calcium-loaded miscreant will have your anus hole doing the macarena in excitement. For most of you, it will be the 1st time this part of the human body pull off these moves without intervention from Taco Bell. [more]
