Going hands free may not be an option. But the Duoplex community abandoned her a long time ago so this isn't exactly a foreign concept. Applications are open.
Broken dialogue and dimly lit sexual acts that would be embarrassed to find themselves in a McDonald's drivethru. Name is unknown, but when she's not getting rushed down at 4" per minute she watches Hallmark channel. Probably.
This was voted the #2 reason to wake up Saturday morning with an unexplained rash in between your ass cheeks. Only falling short to raw dogging The Big Arch.
If her facial expressions look familiar to you, then you too have felt the sweet kiss of Red Lobster's endless shrimp platter. A feeling taken from us all way too soon...
Stewart and his local Dungeons and Dragons chapter approach your wife with their war drums out, looking for an impromptu handicap match. What do you do?
Requesting $14.00 for a cup of pre-burnt plastic coffee beans from the jungles of Madagascarfuckyourself rly should come w/ a point card that redeems this prize.
Getting blown out within shouting distance of your HOA'd neighbors is a pretty bold move. Actually, it's one of superiority. Nancy and her 13 cats will most definitely think twice about filing a noise complaint at the next board meeting.
Look closely and you'll notice the dive bar bathroom graffiti tattoo coverage isn't even at 30%. Unfortunately that means the future will involve heavy machinery.
"Uber rideshare is a service where everyday drivers use their own personal cars to give people rides. You request, track, and pay for a ride using a smartphone app. There is also an option called Uber Share where you split a car with strangers."
More [here] where the story is her BF launching a nuclear attack on a neighboring country is apparently less important than her fat tits in a Party City maid costume.
Remember when Hantavirus got ignored so hard it disappeared? Well your favorite social degenerate is here to bring back that biological chaos and disorder to the public transportation of your choosing. Choose your form of PPE wisely.
Booty blasted before getting down her first bowl of Apple Jacks for the day and completely proud of it. Since this behavior doesn't show signs of stopping any time soon, here's a free tip lady: Start wiping front to back from now on. Trust me.
Not every day someones title has me scratching all three nuts in bewilderment. But "Dumb Flashlight with Cow Tits" is a choice. Not even all 32 volumes of Encyclopedia Britannica are any help and my disappointment is immeasurable.
She may be all giggles and Valtrex right now, but the 3:00AM smile will soon fade once Becky Smackapuss gets the dry cleaning bill for that Target linen. #doomed
Not everyone has this kind of affinity for high prioritizing siphoning the python over a meaningful long lasting relationship. That's cuz not everyone is this girl.
Some would say her build is an outright unfathomable piece of modern day art. Others, nothing you wouldn't see after accidentally falling on the ground in the women's handicap bathroom stall at a California Starbucks. Or so I'm told.
A vaginal opening that doesn't look like it's seen the wheels of an El Dorado is a welcomed change. Perhaps if OF creators could keep the Tampa Bay Buccaneers' starting line outside of their underwears this could become a hot new trend.
