500 pesos spent on a gUrLz tRiP... only to end up getting swarmed by the local freelance gynecologist. Something about the return on investment seems fucky.
The side effects of letting a complete stranger turn his power level to +skidrow abortion before going Hiroshima on ur wife's dirty corncob? Literally nothing. In fact, this might prove without doubt; the inner walls of her anus are nuclear proof.
"My talent know more about you than you. You stupid bitch."
"I'm a fuckin professional, and you're just a whore."
"You're just here to choke on cock right?"
Pusèy Clogusious inadvertently foils the master plan of Adam22's side chick when he convinces her to go live mid-smackdown. Her response? Gigglin like she found an extra tender in her 4-piece Chic-fil A to go box. Relationships shlamationships.
I said it before, and I will say it again: is she green screening her husband with multiple overlays to make it look like the local janitor union is lining up to get their own serving of butt crabs to go? Technology may have peaked before A.I.
Turns out 67,000 incestuous porn videos may have lied to us after all. Dare to make contact with your bloodline after the sun goes down in rural Alabama and this might be the Tales From the Crypt Halloween Special you walk in on. wut?
Normally I'd be the first to out this as being faker than the tip I left a Door Dasher that dropped $75.00 worth of Del Taco (see: 1 value meal). But I did the research, and turns out these 2 share more DNA than Gene Simmons in the 70's. [more]
I have absolutely no way to prove that title... but it could be legit. This wouldn't be the 1st time a man agreed to sample some salami in exchange for living rent free.
Van life nomads with a hygiene regimen? Without video proof I would have called you an ignorant slut of a liar. But 30 seconds into browsing their video catalogue makes me believe there is light at the end of the Hot Cheeto dust-filled tunnel.
18 semesters of Namibian dance theory paid, and this is how you return the favor to ur parents, Becky? u r a disgrace to the once great town of Ballbag, Nebraska.
Today's visuals couldn't get better if you slammed an Ambien cocktail and hit the boardwalk wearing nothing but a smile and Walmart's finest body spray. Speaking of NJ, not even [-carl-] would be caught inside whatever spawned in the last clip.
College life hits different when you're friend with benedicts puts out like Friday morning's trash. Bonus points for being on the all-margarita and plan-b diet.
Girl is Lena Nitro. Guy is never getting another polish job like this ever again. The universe requires balance & the cholesterol level on this walrus is gonna prove it.
See that rush of fear around the 0:58 mark? That's the kind of reaction second only to a man that has miscalculated his maximum capacity for Mountain Dew Code Red in a public venue. And I think that's something we can all relate to.
I don't know when the Gabbie Carter redemption arch started, but I'm all for it. Those early videos of hers were truly historical moments for me and my special edition bugle boy cutoffs, so lets soak this in before gravity calls for the rematch.
"When you can laugh at yourself no one can ever make a fool out of you. Even after you've taken so much collateral damage from jumping into unsolicited orgies, it's pushed your eyes further apart than the little mermaid” — Joan Rivers
Skylar Valentine. Standing at a legitimate 4'7, she may be the only girl that can rim you without having to bend the knee. Daenerys Targaryen might consider that an act of disrespect. Everyone else considers it perfect side-chick material.
A rousing assembly of women that don't believe the sex is over until their lower half is officially dripping more bell pepper chutney than a soup kitchen in Mumbai. And just like exposing yourself to Indian cuisine, someone's leaving skidmarked.
