Sorry hungry peasants trapped under the inflation line. It seems all that lab meat has been diverted. Now if you'll excuse me... I have to watch Interstellar again.
Short of being an extra on Rocco's Retirement Village Tour (coming 2035) - I'm not sure how this talent comes in handy. Never knowing the feels of a consensual relationship maybe? An existence without having to shop for birthday gifts?
Flattery was never my strong point... and it still isn't. Fuckin room looks like it smells worse than wet Newports, and she's chowing down like it's grandma's old fashion applesauce recipe. Your fellow Walmartians will be hearing about this.
Dressed like a common house pet and her asshole looks like it graduated from a 3-month course in sign language judging by those contractions after the 9:00 mark. Go ahead & tell me again why you aren't buying dating girls from Moscow.
Imagine spending weeks convincing your corner store Karen to accept the 2vs1 handicap match, only to sideline her with a cock that gets cease and desist letters from Nike. Just flip that thing over & hit it with a snowmobile again, you'll be aite.
She claims this is legit, and it's the first time "meeting" this dude. Okay lady, sure. And the gangrene I got from "introducing" myself to a stripper that considers Canadian pennies a form of payment will just go away with soap and water.
You can see her frantic postings here. Watching her bait the socially inept into a monthly subscription reminds me of a black widow documentary I saw once. All that's missing is David Attenborough and my bottomless bowl of chic fil a sauce.
Gotta be his wife. The 100 assaults posted to his channel all involve the same target. Considering the site he chose to upload to, you'd expect at least one incident involving adult diapers and a petting zoo. But nope; it never happens.
I want to believe the lore this time. Any girl still rockin a release shirt from the gen 1 Playstation launch is probably no stranger to swiping right on family members.
Dude looks like he walked into a tattoo parlor and said "yes". Luckily he's hung like a brontosaurus to round out those brilliant life decisions. Not sure what's going on with that fucking nut sac though. Every step he takes probably has that monstrosity looking like a Basset Hound going head-first into a wind storm.
There's no shortage of people that consider teaching their penis the macarena a societal norm. Probably not for beginners. Chances are you'll misjudge one 360 no-scope & catch a local in the crossfire. Also known as "The Ben Roethlisberger"
25 exhilarating seconds featuring an open-palmed mushroom strike, face down humiliation and me wondering why the fuck people even put the effort into uploading this nonsense. In 2022 we need penetration, or violence... or cocanium.
That Becky-lynn Dakota Monroe in the first video sure has an interesting way of servicing her community. While everyone reserves their public reamings for the Best Buy customer service line; she decided to start her charity work at home.
Is nut shaming a thing? It's probably easier to adopt Swahili than trying to keep up with today's Twitter dictionary, so excuse me if it actually is. What I do know is her look at the 4:00 mark means the situation is not bussin, fr fr no capitals.
Hate to break your skid row fantasy, but homegirl isn't a vagrant. I actually still remember when this video first circulated; When desensitization was still a thing and public acts actually shocked people. Now nothing short of parallel parking a mini cooper into somebodies asshole gets the blood flowing. [ full version here ]
1) That Resident Evil show on Netflix 2) Electric Vehicles 3) Whatever fucking noise is coming out of this autistic gremlin's mouth. It may not be in order, but these are undoubtedly the top three erection deflating moments of 2022.
Jell-o has spent over 130 years trying to market jiggle like this and have seemingly failed miserably. Turns out all you need is a one-bedroom apartment in Lithuania and growing up without a father to really capture maximum chlamydia velocity.
Seeing a condom in one of these random hookup videos is actually becoming a rare occurrence. Both Mountain Dew and Plan B thank you for your contributions.
Social media misfit suffering from the combo of attention whoring & bug-eyed bitch syndrome performs the unhealthiest act of eroticism I've witnessed since girl_shits_herself_at_limp_bizkit_concert.mp4. Didn't see that one? ur missing out.
