Buttsex is buttsex, I don't discriminate. But I bet you 5 buckaroos that this scallywag had no idea there was an upside to it. I can literally see her slowly transforming from :| to :D with every uppercut to the pancreas.
2 beers turn this rookie into the Jim Lahey of live-in girlfriends. First, she attempts to mark the futon, then she moves to the kitchen to deposit her wonderpuss. I think Budweiser just found itself it's new spokeswoman.
My stance on remaking classics goes from "fuck you" to "where's the damn sequel?" as these masters of cinema dismember a baker's dozen worth of stunt cocks in a way that would make Tom Savini soil himself in envy.
Apparently looking like a Duck Dynasty stunt double turns you into the Merlin of slaying pussy... and today his expertise is all open-source. Practice what you see here and I promise, those hookers will never LOL again.
Critics are gonna have a barmitzvah with this one, but imma go with faker than Chris Brown's heterosexuality. BUT: nobody got hurt, that discharge wasn't CGI and someone added a cool IMDB credit: Physics Whore #2.
Two mugs worth of Germany's finest lagers, and this ladies mouth turns into a portable glory hole. I'm talking blowjobs, community service style. So disgraceful you'd think she was running for president of the US and A.
Ever witness a housewife buckin' like a Russian gymnast being bulldozed by Patrick Ewing? More importantly, who has a bigger penis: Kanye West or Lindsay Lohan?
I've never seen this chick cave before, no matter how big the cock. It's as if her vaginal canal is made of Teflon, with more square footage than James Van Deer Beek's forehead. But after seeing this, I'm not so sure.
I've seen some questionable shit in my 15+ years of Internetting. Venezuelan dolphin porn, sexually explicit photos of the girl from Precious, 2 minutes of 2016's Ghostbusters. But this? This gave my dick Alzheimer's.
Only 1 thing compliments the smooth stylings of progressive underground Serbian folk music: And that's getting more of a rash on your crotch from the guy you raw dogged, than the toilet. Ya dun good tonight, Babooshka.
There's only 2 things I value in life more than quilted toilet paper. One involves napalm and celebrity home tours. The other is sexually frustrated women giving less than a fuck in public. Today I get 1 wish granted.
If only he put as much effort in his camera equipment, as he did in forcing volcanic yogurt explosions, maybe we wouldn't be jacking off to Sega CD-quality full motion video right now. Up your game motherfucker.
From this angle it looks like dude is having sex with an eggplant. But after hearing this chunker bitch up more of a storm than a black woman getting short changed at Golden Corral, I have been convinced otherwise.
You can brag about your 16 pounds of lethal weaponry all you want. If this is wat you choose to do with it, its about as useful as pack of Trojans to a Pokemon Go'r.
Her i drive a Dodge Caravan & use coupons on Vagisil look is on-point. She's also in need of an orgasm from something not-battery powered. The 'early' chestnut evacuation at :44 is fake. Her IRL desperation is not.
He's got a unique look. Could almost pass for a greeter at an Aspergers-only Hollister. But the compliments end there, cause this being online only sunk his stock faster than Brexit. I can smell the suicide note from here.
Concert goes from casual genital appreciation, to a full blown AIDS epidemic when 1 reckless cunt turns her vayjay into a full serve cock carwash. 1 migrant after another get granted VIP access, zero questions asked.
Her boyfriend's the kinda dude that gets so high, he tries to vacuum his own shadow. Clearly this is a girl that's no stranger to surprise trips to the gynecologist.
