and a beautiful face. and amazing tits. But how about the personality? Probably less depth than a gerbil's vagina. I like you, I'll pleasure myself to you, but the pedestal remains reserved for Veronica Mars.
Pretty hot, amiright? Too bad she's no amateur. This is pornstar Jessie Rogers. Never heard of her? Lemme put it this way. That vadge has serviced more cocks than a public urinal in New Delhi. #buzzkill.
The face of a ladyboy, tummy of Tara Reid, and a
rear-end that only a visually impaired African American could love. Okay, that was mean. I do look forward to seeing you in the XXX remake of Elephant Man though.
Interesting surname. Was it chosen out of love for the search engine... or the busboy at the Panda Express where she clearly binge ate chicken chow mein tridaily? Scroll down, watch last video and you'll understand.
Genius idea, poor execution. People want to see a petite Hispanic with a greasy asshole ride that bike through a swap meet. Not Ned Flanders in Fuckstick, Tennessee. Now apologize to your Walmart denim.
$4 and a zip folder of sexually suggestive photos of House M.D. says this dude gets recognized. Sorry friend, the glory days of you wearing your daughters underwear as a Mexican wrestling mask are over.
and by 'gangbang' I mean one sexually inept man losing his virginity while Carlos Mencia's 72 cousins spectate. The only thing missing is a Mariachi band and one token black guy repeatedly screaming "worldstar".
Good call on the medical grade latex gloves. Those wheelchair-bound, mentally incapacitated boys are notorious for their legions of sexual partners. You just dodged herpes, AIDS, maybe even breast cancer.
No seriously. The thumbnail doesn't even come close to doing this epically breasted beaner justice. She has titties like Hulk Hogan has male pattern baldness. TBH I'd suck the Nacho Supreme out of her shithole.
Apparently this is Bailey Jay, the Vita Don Teese of chicks w/ dicks. I'm not so sure. Some will look at this and see a beautiful shemale, all I see is that goofy fuck from Saving Silverman.
She looks fine in the first pic, but if you keep scrolling down... it becomes pretty apparent who her parents are. Mother: Eva Mendez. Father: fucking Gonzo from Sesame Street. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL.
This is her 3rd anal tattoo. First 2 featured the names of her ex-lovers. Hey lady, men come and go. How about for this 3rd one you get something that won't be changing anytime soon - "stupid pug-faced whore".
Is this really Paris Hilton? No, what you really should be asking is: if Amy Winehouse was to spread open her pussy lips, would it be visually liken to pulling apart the bread of a grilled cheese sandwich?
There's a very thin line between making love and balls-deep cornholio slaughterage. Where that line lies, I do no know, but I can sure as fuck tell you this greasy Estonian sure as fuck crossed it.
This is wrong. More wrong than the time I defecated a weeks worth of BK value meals into the VHS case of Honey, I Shrunk The Kids and slipped it down a Blockbuster drop-box. Actually no, that was hilarious.
This is actually standard Japanese 'i cant satisfy you with my cock, might as well kill you' syndrome. Fortunately revolutionary science has blessed us with Extenze penis pills. Save up your fortune cookies bro.
The girl in video #1 is actually Jenna Jameson. It's pretty refreshing to know that not even the highest paid crackwhore in porn isn't immune from the delights of accidental sodomy. PROTIP: wasn't an accident.
This bitch is the Mother Teresa of blowjobs. I thought I was a pretty charitable bro after donating 3 Red Bulls to the caravan of female vagrants down my street last week. That's diddly squat compared to this Moesha.
How this girl was sexually aroused enough to secrete a glob of Cool Whip is beyond me. The sack of shit fucking her is as big as a Fiat. Fortunately he knows how to dress. Motherfucking camouflage brah.
Hey Christina. Here's a concept for your next big song. It's called "I Used To Be Hot But Now My Face Looks Bloated Like Newt Gingrich's Asshole & I Cant Stop My Vagina From Leaking V8 Splash". Straight from the soul.
