I don't know man. Is this really what passes for must-have e-celebrity content that people are willing to pay for? Call me a traditionalist, but back in my day our sex tapes actually had sex in them. And piss jugs. Never forget the piss jugs.
Well damn, if the first 30 seconds of this video didn't confirm Smash Bros being a fighting game then I don't know what to tell you. The tech of a ballsac that's unblockable on wakeup basically confirms everything you don't want to admit.
Apparently these psycho soviets were keeping a legit sex slave, and documenting the entire thing via a Pornhub profile which was wiped clean. But it's the Internet so... nothing is gone forever. Except maybe her definition of "rim jobs" (you'll see)
You don't have to be a full Chad to experience this kind of public salami sloshing. Just find a girl that's sexually attracted to Amibos and the lifetime bans from all major airlines will flow in faster than you can complain about them on Twitter.
Today we learn three crucial things, so grab your colored pencils and pay attention: #1: Voyeurism is alive and well #2: Sexual misconduct is always negotiable. And #3: Lifetime bans from Macy's aren't a big deal. Lets get it.
This is standard middle-aged woman for "I saw a college girl do this on Instagram once so I can do it too" syndrome. Fortunately science has gifted us the video footage to accompany this lifelong stigma that can never be washed off. #facts
As fate would have it, not even a grim reaper of a pandemic can slow down a girls quest for Internet notoriety and Instagram followers. But as for the spectator in the last video? I think she just reinforced her sanitizing regime beyond Covid 19.
I can't imagine what else the BFF in question has been forced to spectate in the past. But I'm betting it involves the neighbor's cat and all 12 flavors of Rice-a-Roni.
The setup is fake. Being hung like one of those fucking things from Attack on Titan is not. Someone better prepare the ice bath for Ava Dalush - It just might starve off some of the nerve damage her uterus is dealing with now. And forever.
Also known as "small wiener compensation". It happens when homebois packing less meat than a vegetarian BBQ get discouraged by their girl's complete lack of excitement. Sounding like the immigrant guy from That 70's Show is optional.
See that smile? I know that smile. That's the "I got 15 minutes to kill before Anthropologie needs me to mark up prices on the pinecone enema kits so let's make it quick" smile. The things you absorb after living in NYC for > 23 days.
Overtime hours in an industry that fucks more vocal cords than fronting a death metal band isn't a recommendation. But wedding rings are $$$... so I'm just sayin.
Is there some sort of correlation between popular girls with SIMP armies and sex acts less interesting than Betty White getting 15 unsupervised minutes with a lawn sprinkler? These hype machines never seem to deliver. Prove me wrong?
All I learned from this is a 2-pack of Coors Light gives all the confidence someone needs to perform in public. And today, all that education is free. Practice what you see here & I promise those size-11 Craigslist girls will never "LMAO" at you again.
When the ass is this level of quality, ur little "iz just a prank br0" turns into "2nd degree felony assault" pretty damn fast. Thats your lesson for the day, TikTok'rs.
Not even the worst thing this creature of the night has done either. She's the "self-proclaimed filthiest slut in the Centennial State" but I'm not sure how many uppercuts to the fallopian tubes it took to earn that title. More of ALEIGHA HERE
uhh... just what in the Tennessee family reunion inside a Denny's handicapped bathroom stall is going the fuck on here? So many questions have come to mind.
Speculation time: Misogynist? Eccentric fetish? The mating ritual of the Monarch Southern Californian? We may never know the answer, but one thing is certain: His verbal assault would have landed a 6-figure comedy special from HBO in 1998.
I don't know what year Britney Spears was relevant, but judging by the world championship on CHUD #203's shoulder, I think everyone in this video does.
Not exactly building an impressive resume when 2 1/2 inches of Alabama's finest sends you running for the Neosporin. This might interfere with her five year plan.
Shy? Shame? These words mean about as much as shit covered lollipop in 2021; Where your OnlyFans revenue is only limited by a false sense of morality. Not sure how the zero-sex Twitch syndicate is going to follow this performance tho.
Take notes fellas; If girls aren't flocking to your Levi's like extra chromosomes to Shia LaBeouf, then you're doing it wrong. Neighbors, the elderly, second cousins - absolutely nobody is safe from the charm of this community service manager.
