You know you've hit peak ridiculous when this is the least shocking thing on your resume. You probably already know who Lily Phillips is so I'll spare the intros and/or bacterial cultures, but feel free to have a chuckle at her newest stunt.
The receptacle in question seems to be none other than [Rebel Rhyder]. And after seeing what [she can do] with nothing more than a small hometown dream and [license to mine copper], I'm guessing this is just another Tuesday morning.
Shame she doesn't make raunchy butt ripper videos anymore. A damn crying shame. Never again will we see this level of excitement when it comes to colonizing the dark planet. EDIT: she's still alive/active. more [here] and [here]
The story may be 10lbs of bullshit. But at least it's employment bullshit and not inter-family uncle dad father dishwasher bullshit. That's real progress. [MiaKink]
Quite the compliment. So endearing I would consider parting with my first-edition Lindsay Lohan love doll just for a fighting chance at being lost inside her bush fire. The current rehabed Lohan. Not that "snorting tide pods is my zen" version.
Damn I havent seen urban dominance like that since witnessing an inexperienced citizen cut in line during the illustrious Popeye's chicken sandwich craze of 2019.
I'm no expert in maintaining relationships with total strangers... but I do know a thing or two about self-medication: And you can't blame this one on the Nyquil.
"I wonder what happened to that up and comer chick [Kristen Scott] that was super popular at one time? She just vanished. I should look her up and find-. oh."
More dead ends behind those eyes than an apartment building in Silent Hill, but the box squeezes harder than a retard a petting zoo so sacrifices will be made.
Another chapter closed in a book that Barnes & Noble insists on displaying in the Sci-Fi section. Normally read in the dimly lit corner of a trailer park, surrounded by Newport butts and half-eaten cans of Trader Joe's finest stuffed meatball ravioli.
If this man's idea of romance is a metaphor for the west being able to raise those population numbers, I'd say this is proof we are buttfucked. Unironically of course.
Normally I'd be the first to out this as being faker than the tip I left a Door Dasher that dropped $43.00 worth of Del Taco (see: 1 value meal). But I did the research, and turns out these two share more DNA than Gene Simmons in the 70's. [more]
If uve been gifted the dimensions of a jar of grammas old fashioned marmalade there's only two things left to do. So if you share the same genetics, take notes and consider this Plan C after you get banished from the batting cages for life.
All I ask is that you watch the entire thing and promise to never replicate any of it. Especially that indoor power washing in the last video. One wrong push and you run the risk of turning the thunderstorm into a full blown shit show. #imserious
I know that look. Normally mistaken for being on the wet end of a crypto rug pull, or ur proctologist reaching for spicy mayo instead of an authorized lubricant; it's caused by something totally different. And in most cities u can get it for $20/rock.
One of those rare moments where I can overlook the Pepboys bolt-on milk sacs because the performance is legendary. More strawberryshan deprivation HERE
Surely this is a planted setup, right? This dude has a ton of other videos, but I simply refuse to believe a degenerate this brazen would be shown less audible disgust than someone being told the McFlurry machine is broken when noticed.
spoiler: it's the pepperoni-scented Call of Duty veteran getting his pickle popped, not the other way around. Apparently tha bros thought it would be hilarious to pay an escort to give Stewart the best 2.5 minutes of his life. Another spoiler: It is.
Basically a public service announcement on the pros and cons of using Tinder in New Orleans. Some live to tell the tale. Others are in diapers at the age of 27. All have an abnormally intimate relationship with Newport cigarettes & turkey gravy.
A classic tale, that still to this day has not been explained. Overreaction? A connoisseur of asparagus and cabbage? Or another man that has mastered the art of skeet shooting without a gun? Unfortunately the world may never know.
