Daria Morgendorffer is kicking her OKCupid profile up to a new level. And trust me, the fedora tipping gets real when this m'lady strays away from r/gaming for the first time in history and goes Obi-Wan Kenobi on her Alabama hot pocket.
They're always cut out of the same template like some sort of conveyor belt of mediocrity. But she has nipple direction like Steve Buscemi has 20/80 vision & Im here for the explanation. Somebody ping Bill Nye, I wish to ejaculate scientifically.
· There are 86 divorces per hr compared to 230 marriages per hr
· Estimates say 41% of first marriages will end with a divorce
· As many as 60% of second marriages will not make it
Slammin the salami is no easy task when you're choosing the barn door, and your costar is commonly mistaken for items in Home Depot's gardening section. But her? She'll never know the sweet kiss of General Tso's blast furnace ever again.
He may have less testosterone than a handbag full of Midol. But what he lacks in machismo, he makes up for in... well. Nothing. Man just managed to end both his marriage and access to driving a gas powered vehicle in a single vid. Impressive?
Not all of today's most gifted participants were born with the poker face of Clint Eastwood. So when you bare witness to the equivalent of a vaginal SCUD missile, understand it took practice to get here. More reasons to uninstall the Internet: [x]
Not sure what actually happened here, but it doesn't look like an unannounced serving of Jossepi's homemade alfredo sauce was the reason for a time out. If you listen closely, it sounds like a neighbor was tired of the female's mating calls.
uhh, of all the ways to catch a venereal disease in the southern hemisphere, this would have been at least 3rd on my list. Right behind spelling my name with a Q on Tinder, and fucking anything with the words "Manager's Special" written on it.
Damn I havent seen urban dominance like that since witnessing an inexperienced citizen cut in line during the illustrious Popeye's chicken sandwich craze of 2019.
3:10 for the moment of truth. Is dude being honest? Are those surgical gloves? Did I free throw one into the sink at Starbucks from the foul line because their one stall was closed off this morning? All these questions have the same answer.
If uve been gifted the dimensions of a jar of grammas old fashioned marmalade there's only two things left to do. So if you share the same genetics, take notes and consider this Plan C after you get banished from the batting cages for life.
What in the Alabama backwoods barn burning bullshit is goin on in that last clip? Mating ritual? Vegan skin care? Reasons I won't enter Ubers without plastic wrap?
Flirting is pretty straight forward. Just flick the hair, bat some eyes and let the cringe commence. Becky seems to have turned the dial to 73. Bold choice, but if this is a repeat incident then shes filling more bucketlists than bungee jumping.
I've been seeing this Jade Kink individual popping up all over the tubes for a long time now, and I gotta say; Her upbringing must have had more disappointments than a trailer park family reunion. Fucking girl is out of her piss-drinking mind...
Don't let that cunning smile fool you. This girl has zero love for her significant other & hotel room upholstery. As illustrated somewhere between the 4th & 19th uppercut to her cervix by the newcomer. something something hpy anniversary?
The true legacy Amber Blank has left behind in the world of cuckolding is kind of frightening when you think about it. Edit: It looks like she's still active to this day or someone is trying to monetize a defunct amateur pornstar's content. #mystery
I'm no expert, but we may be reaching critical levels of shamelessness here. Or as the Italians used to call it; "Exterminus Adversus Slutterdominous". disclaimer: Be sure not to say that three times or your furniture might start floating the room.
Quite the compliment. So endearing I would consider parting with my first-edition Lindsay Lohan love doll just for a fighting chance at being lost inside her bush fire. The current rehabed Lohan. Not that "snorting tide pods is my zen" version.
