Easily the most deplorable attempt at infidelity to ever grace my 11" Amiga computer monitor [this week]. And that's coming from a human being who's seen more than 23 consecutive mins of an Dwayne Johnson movie. My opinion counts.
I remember when couples would upload their finest Nokia flip vids onto websites that couldn't get cleared for an SSL certificate. So trust when I say having more flash tattoos than visible skin is a bit distracting from the story ur trying to tsell.
What drives a mild-mannered college girl to abandon education and pursue a profession of having her insides prepped like a Thanksgiving turkey? Vapes? The zyns? Letting Katy Perry continue to make music? We may never know. [more]
Your significant other gets curious about being on the receiving end of a 1-man firing squad. And before the next round can even be chambered, she's already hypothesizing how to make the end of your life look like an accident. Classic.
"Sydney Sweeney is not currently engaged; she and her fiancé Jonathan Davino called off their wedding in March 2025. The couple, who were engaged in 2022 after reportedly dating since 2018, have decided to go their separate ways."
Being converted into a middle-aged pretzel probably wasn't on the to-do list for ole' perky tits Tina, but it just took her Sheldon Scale rating from a 4 to a hefty 7.3.
Just when you think it's safe to trust again, some vagabond goes and makes unannounced deposits in your sausage mitten. Was it worth the beating Vladimir?
If we could go ahead and get an ID on her, that would be fantastic. Try to time it around the Black Friday sales on 10-packs of tube socks if possible. Appreciate it.
What's truly ridiculous is the volume of desperate comments under this video. Bangladesh treating Xhamster like a dating app will never not be amusing to me.
Some women need a good meal and a goodnight text to reach their sexual peak. But this one? Just one half-assed request has her pastrami butterfly goopafied. Not a single phone in sight. Just 2 people living in the moment. I kinda respect it.
This is what happens when Chaturbate gets saturated w/ day-ones and you have to find new ways to scalp juicer tokens. All because a taxi driver from Tanzania can't stop maxing out his data so he can tell asiangirl8537 to "show anal & borb".
Dude's hairline looks like a Detroit skyline and has "overdose" across his jugular. And still managed to pull a 9/10 that rawdogs anal. u no longer have any excuses.
Fact: Cam girls are forever evolving. Take this lively South American fuck goof for example. When the pesos started slowing down she introduced "La Torta de Dinosaurio" to the show and engagement skyrocketed. Entrepreneurship is crazy.
My gut tells me soon after this video finished, her status as "loyal girlfriend" was about as believable as the Fast & Furious franchise stopping after the 47th movie.
Turns out using your velvet buzzsaw as a communal carpet cleaner isn't offensive to everybody. Let this be definitive proof that testosterone still exists in the world.
Not a bad reason to jump the pond and do a little sightseeing. In fact, throw in a bowl of your finest solyanka and I might make a weekend out of it. [more here]
Staring at wood paneling as her middle-aged leather cheerio permeates the air with the aroma of Newport Menthols and Skittles. That's the life we all strive for.
Honestly it makes sense. If infidelity was judged on the widening of your rectal cavity, then every man thats peaked their curiosity at chipotle is a serial cheater.
idk who she is but the checklist has already been maxed out: Puts out on date #1. Maintains a consistent diet of cabbage, and has absolutely no respect for the shower mat you borrowed from mom. Are those wedding bells?
First warning sign should have been suggesting Ziploc Big Bags as contraceptive. The 2nd was needing to pay for a day pass in order to enter the donkey exhibit.
