Always the same setup with these Clydesdales: Find a soft 7, then time it just right to bust a nut while asking for directions to Wetzel Pretzel. Today is no exception.
Turning a non-Snorlax into wifey, only to find out she's been doing THIS while you're on the clock. Literally a top 3 reason amphetamines are so popular again.
While padding your resume may not exactly be something generally frowned upon when seeking an enhancement in your employment opportunities, safety should always be your first priority. And at least 1 change of your finest linens.
Just the thought of this calcium-loaded miscreant will have your anus hole doing the macarena in excitement. For most of you, it will be the 1st time this part of the human body pull off these moves without intervention from Taco Bell. [more]
You would think one day in the future a video of your significant other being railroaded in the shallow end of a pool human sized petri dish would return to haunt you. And if u do, u'd be right. She'll never show her face in Walmart again.
Sorry hungry peasants eternally trapped under the inflation line. It seems all that lab grown meat has been diverted to her upper body. Now if you'll excuse me...
If uve been gifted the dimensions of a jar of grammas old fashioned marmalade, then you may have never experienced this situation. Alpha Chads such as yourself would power through both this interruption, and the following domestic assault.
More [here] where the story is her BF launching a nuclear attack on a neighboring country is apparently less important than her fat tits in a Party City maid costume.
Not her first rodeo. Real ball-knowers have seen this mongrel practically drown herself in unknown BBC way before OF was a thing. Just the love of the game.
As fate would have it combining the genetics of a 1st-world pornstar and modern tech yields impressive results. 7 seconds. 7 seconds is all that you will spare her.
Imagine coming home during the witching hour only to find your significant other kneeling down, thorax-deep on Jamal's chopped cheese. (The Harlem original)
Don't let the optimistic smiles fool you. This social media misfit has less concern for the ringus around her bingus than a unionized construction worker on his lunch break. aka damage is imminent. Oh well. Try your best, DLSS5 the rest.
The camera never pans downtown, so we don't know if that blowhole has more gape in it than the San Andreas Fault. But despite her knuckle oven seeing diapers before the age of 30 or not, dude landed himself a bonafide superstar.
idk what kind of Amish paradise rules they agreed to before making the match, but this shit doesn't work for me brother. Interesting loophole though. It's kind of like tax harvesting, where the people watching are the only ones getting fucked.
One of those rare moments where I can overlook the Pepboys bolt-on milk sacs because the performance is legendary. More strawberryshan deprivation HERE
Staring at wood paneling as her middle-aged leather cheerio permeates the air with the aroma of Newport Menthols and Skittles. That's the life we all strive for.
Requesting $14.00 for a cup of pre-burnt plastic coffee beans from the jungles of Madagascarfuckyourself rly should come w/ a point card that redeems this prize.
30 seconds in and two things will become glaringly apparent: 1) We've been grossly mislead about Alabama's tourist attractions. And 2) At least 50% of the people who seek these out have ejaculated to lawn mower maintenance videos.
What's that old saying? Go big or go home? If it's in her ass she's all class? If your tip is brown shut it down? I don't know but someone probably just got a raise.
Gotta respect a man that can make a white girl stop in her tracks faster than a Target clearance sale by simply removing his Nike Dri-FITs, and hangin' brain.
An assembly of miscreants that may remind you of old Internet when people did everything imaginable for nothing more than access to a bottomless keg. Twitter didnt exist, OnlyFans wasnt a thought. It was just for the love of the game. [more]
