Another historical moment that turned Pierre Woodman into the Terminator we know him as today. These deteriorating VHS tapes really do belong in a museum.
Surface-to-air tits like an enhanced Nina North, attitude straight outta New Jersey and doesn't believe in webcam technology created after 1997. If her boyfriend didn't look like he writes Among Us fan fiction, we'd have an all time great here.
Not everyone has this affinity for high prioritizing siphoning the python over a meaningful long lasting relationship. That's cuz not everyone is Anna Chambers
"I'll tell ya one thing about my personal life that I've never told before. I never fucked a ten, but one night, I fucked five twos. And I think that ought to count. I think that ought to go in your record as a positive achievement." - George Carlin
Only the real ones will remember when this cockamanie goof getting sent to Fuck Town USA was pretty much the most watched porn video in the world. It didn't matter what site you dedicated your cum sock to, it was there. For eternity.
Imagine documenting last nights Smirnoff-inspired gangbang and going viral in two completely different ways at the same time. #herpes #snapchat #effecient
Protip for my ever-evolving female viewer base: If you ever find yourself in this situation, make sure you order the blooming onion first. Outback servers tend to frown upon this kind of behavior out of the gate. Don't ask me how I know.
If you're into the kind of erotica that reminds you of the black market for hackey sacks and burned Blink 182 CD's, you should probably throw them a few bucks.
I'll admit that last clip might be enough to ruin your holiday feast later today. But it's Thanksgiving and you probably need something to talk to grandma about before the sweet potatoes hit the table. You should be thanking me, Mortimer.
Just what in the fuck is actually going on here? Is she green screening her husband with 5 overlays to make it look like the local janitor union is lining up to get their own serving of anal crabs to go? We've reached the peak of technology.
Just remembering when Gabbie Carter was the Internet's most wanted. Now, the amount of early aging porn causes has come into question again. [2019] [2021 ] inb4 we witness a union that classifies rectal trauma as a benefits package?
It seems a 2-pack of Bud Light turns you into the Gandolf of parking lot pussy pickups... and today his teachings are all free of charge. Practice what you see here and I promise those, size-11 Tinder girls will never "LMAO" at you again.
Look, I understand setting realistic expectations for yourself in life... but maybe we can try to do better than communal ashtray next time? I believe in you.
Not exactly the most unexpected chain of events from a woman that comes less prepared for war than whoevers handicap stall I invaded at Waffle House last week. Sorry Wheels, but the janitor bucket doesn't meet my capacity standard.
TikTok Porn: These zero effort chicks are about as exciting as an audio book of Alex Jones customizing a footlong at Subway. But throw in a few paywall'd parasocial relationships and suddenly they become a legends in the making.
