You would think one day in the future a video of your significant other being railroaded in the shallow end of a pool human sized petri dish would return to haunt you. And if u do, u'd be right. She'll never show her face in Walmart again.
Of all the unexpected fluids you can get blasted with in the backseat of a mid-range economy car, it's really not all that bad. People with friends that frequent the Dairy Queen drive-thru on a weekly basis know what I'm talking about.
The more cringe the girl, the further they have to go for attention. A simple concept officially reinforced by this 97lbs of solid Slavic skankarooni. I'll put it this way: watching this forced me to drink Kettle One again. It's that kinda Caucasity.
That stance she takes around the 16:14 mark and her saying "okay" to the entire book of flash tattoos tells you all you need to know about this videos authenticity.
As fate would have it combining the genetics of a 1st-world pornstar and modern tech yields impressive results. 7 seconds. 7 seconds is all that you will spare her.
"if you're caught, DON'T STOP!" That's not a direct quote or anything. And it probably shouldn't be one. Especially for that broken fire hydrant seasoning the corner table at Smash Burger around the 5:00 mark. wtf is wrong with u people?
I get the "i gOtTa MaKe SuRe tHe ThUmbNaiL hAs tO lOoK LiKe i hAvE BRaIn dAmaGe" bullshit, but could you have spared us the fucking HVAC tape across her mouth? I'd like to keep my erection as far away from Home Depot as possible.
Pretty fuckin impressive build there. I bet you'd double fist the pelmeni borscht out of your own slavic shithole just to get within arm's reach of those juice bags.
More dead ends behind those eyes than an apartment building in Silent Hill. But the box squeezes harder than a retard at a petting zoo so sacrifices will be made.
The WWE-inspired outfit has to be community noted here. Showing appreciation for Stephanie Vaquer, or 1 hammer away from Tim The Toolman Taylor cosplay?
Tinder is integrating AI to reduce "swipe fatigue" and enhance user experience through personalized matching and improved safety. Key features will include "Chemistry" (AI-driven daily recommendations based on persona/photo analysis)
As far as historic rope throwing content goes, this has to be somewhere in the top 10. Before breaking tha internet was an overused buzzword to shill celebrity shit slop, this Slavic masterpiece was Double-D'ing her way to legendary status. #win
In a society where your social status is measured by how many inches of BBC have ruptured your digestive system, you have to assume this Fiona is hovering somewhere in between "girl next door" and "super walmart cashier". Any takers?
Honestly, I dig the vibe. She's 1 part goth, 27 parts mental patient. Make direct contact with her cervix at just the right velocity and she starts throwing the kind of rival gang signs that would get your ass smoked in Rancho Cucamonga.
Look closely and you'll notice the dive bar bathroom graffiti tattoo coverage isn't even at 30%. Unfortunately that means the future will involve heavy machinery.
That's not an actual quote from the video, but it should be. It seems Susana is having a little trouble with broski's maximum depth potential. And by trouble, I mean the kind of organ rearrangement Art The Clown would be impressed by.
Like the thunderdome, a Woody casting means two enter but only 1 leaves with a working sphincter. The following rush to Costco's adult diaper section is usually a dark day in the victim's life... but not today. Double BOOM. Double DOOM. [more]
A rare fourth stage does actually exist, but the video wasn't long enough to see if the barn door entrance was supplied with a proper dressing of WD-40 or not.
Believe it or not this was actually voted the number two reason to wake up Saturday morning with an unexplained rash in between your ass cheeks. Only falling short to raw dogging Taco Bell's new Cantina Chicken Mexican Pizza.
