See? Not every post here has to be about unsuitable bodily penetrations and the Montana residents that love them. Sometimes you gotta slow down and appreciate women that would charge $99.99 to drop ship you their fart jars.
Seems like a nice girl. The type that'd throw herself in front of a train if u missed a text or cheat because a piece of amethyst told her to. But her enthusiasm? I've seen happier faces cleaning the handicap toilets at Renaissance Fairs. Pass.
The aroma of McChicken wrappers and a homeless man's piss rag may not do anything to get your penis to maximum hardness. But you aren't part of this duo.
Self-proclaimed anaconda smuggler gets humbled after spending < 4.7 seconds on the dark side, leaving her no option but to tap out. The check isn't in the mail.
The amount of women that wait in que to get bulldozed by this maniac is actually surprising. What could be done in the privacy of your own home with a gas generator and jumper cables, has been brought to public view. In high defs.
Ya know what. When you're stuck with gynecomastia and the endurance of a diabetic Snorlax, scoring women of this caliber probably needs to be celebrated. Congratulations to all these heroes. MORE: [-1-] [-2-] [-3-] [-4-] [-5-] [-6-] [7]
Pay attention to how "she" goes full Chernobyl centaur at the .03 second mark. Then remember that at least half of Instagram users will think this is real, start flirting with it in broken English and try sending it money. half. We're fucked.
Alternate source of income? Unfortunate consequence of normalizing Twitter? Evolution? Try all of the above. Legend has it the last time Little Caesar caught her in the parking lot, a pepperoni famine started. Personally I'm not so sure.
George Lopez is juiced to the gills and managed to procure one of Starbuck's finest Coffee Artists™. The result? Only her gynecologist and Jiffy Lube knows.
Between the instructions that actually devolve human beings and whatever the fuck ancient language was trying to leak out of the guy in the last clip, I think it's safe to say we have some form of a predicament in our educational system(s).
Said thumbnail is at the 1:35 mark. Honestly it's not very eventful. But for a split second during Sandy's post-ass whooping call for a time out, she looks like Clint Eastwood with long hair and double-D tits. It's kinda erotic when u think about it.
I thought this girl evolved into her final degen form. And then she released a vid [with this title] and confirmed it. Honorable mention for the [rest of her catalog]
If you want attention in 2025, it's gonna take a lot more than hangin brain in the checkout line at Hot Topic. So take notes ladies, because it's this kind of work ethic that springboards you from "girl friend" to "girl wife". Respectfully of course.
Honestly it makes sense. If infidelity was judged on the widening of your rectal cavity, then every man thats peaked their curiosity at chipotle is a serial cheater.
Looks like a one and done because I've never seen another video of her before. Which is a damn crying shame. The consequential followup of her getting samoan dropped inside a Del Taco handicap stall would've been worth the wait.
I never have to worry about being injected into such an experience. I only reserve hotel rooms for Jerkmate marathon practice, not to dine and dash prostitutes.
She claims this is legit, and it's the first time "meeting" this dude. Okay lady, sure. And the gangrene I got from "introducing" myself to a stripper that considers Canadian pennies a form of payment will just go away with fast orange and water.
Fresh out of an Arby's dumpster dive and new to the OF scene, this Malboro-enhanched trio are Valtex'ing their way to redneck superstardom. The flannel shirt gourmet knows this isn't porn. It's preparation for a monster truck rally.
Where the fuck has she been practicing that technique and are they still allowed within 100 yards of Thanksgiving dinner? These 2 things seem to be intertwined.