"Squirting on the UBER driver" usually isn't a service you can add through the app. But anyone that's taken the old Taco Bell detour on the way home from a bar knows it becomes negotiable before the trip has been completed. iykyk
Scroll to the 4:20 mark for the definitive highlight of this sacrilegious compilation of misguided deviants. I promise that your disappointment is nearly impossible.
Wow, dude actually documented the entire thing from bar to bedroom. In the world of half-assed 4th wall acting, you have no idea how rare this actually is.
A better title for this one would be "Last nights pasta primevera makes a surprise reappearance but my daughter can't stop violating herself for strangers in Uzfukisthan so I can't use my own shitter". Unfortunately there's a character limit.
idk where this is, but try it in the US of A and the situation will be immediately amplified a guy 1 Michelob Ultra away from a public rampage. That's a warning. Never underestimate a man with garbage bags full of [this shit] in his basement.
A classic tale, that still to this day has not been explained. Overreaction? A connoisseur of asparagus and cabbage? Or another man that has mastered the art of skeet shooting without a gun? Unfortunately the world may never know.
Don't know exactly who to blame here, but judging by her mannerisms it's safe to say this happens more often than transmitting STD's at a Taylor Swift concert.
[Lama Grey] up at bat again. This (French?) testicle gremlin is simply way too popular to not follow up on. I mean, just look at her list of interests: "Dorama, anime, horses, video game. Walk, smoking weed. Play with cock) "chefskiss.gif
An emphasis on the cardiovascular system, and showing off better grip than David Tyree in the 2008 Superbowl. Pornographic content that incentivizes you to get your ass in shape really is an untapped market. Someone look into that.
He may have less testosterone than a handbag full of Midol. But what he lacks in machismo, he makes up for in... well. Nothing. Man just managed to end both his marriage and access to driving a gas powered vehicle in a single vid. Impressive?
The average American mall has less activity than a graveyard today, so maybe consider this some sort of historical moment instead? A time when window shopping for meat this discounted was considered a communal act. #nostalgia
I know that look. Normally mistaken for being on the wet end of a crypto rug pull, or ur proctologist reaching for spicy mayo instead of an authorized lubricant; it's caused by something totally different. And in most cities u can get it for $20/rock.
I'd be a little less worried about the buttsex and more concerned with whatever off-road vehicle ran over his dick and fled the scene. The fuck is going on down there my guy? Even the lions on Animal Planet don't treat their meat that badly.
The old guard of European crotch grinders really were on a different level. All natural, all interested, & all willing to job a knob in front of unsuspecting bovines.
First time my ass. She's about as much a sex tape virgin as I am a calorie counter at an all you can eat Chinese buffet. And let me tell you Jack; I've taken more than one wok outta commission once the crab rangoon starts hittin trays. Respectfully.
I'm no expert, but we may be reaching critical levels of shamelessness here. Or as the Italians used to call it; "Exterminus Adversus Slutterdominous". #historical
Further proof everything you touch in public has probably been shit, pissed, vomited and cummed on. Multiple times. But not always in that exact order.
· There are 86 divorces per hr compared to 230 marriages per hr
· Estimates say 41% of first marriages will end with a divorce
· As many as 60% of second marriages will not make it
Nice titties. Spunky attitude. But what really sold me was lack of both girth and length on her costar. Look closely - you can almost pinpoint the exact moment his miniature taquito roll ends her confidence in the male gender for all eternity.
Shameless clout demon commandeers a self checkout line wearing less clothing than Kanye West's girlfriend, then contemplates the results. :pepega: :poggers:
Galaxy Gas Gwendolyn seems to have compromised her last functioning brain cell with some combination of synthetic drugs and pineapple White Claws. Chances of homey swiping right in a coastal city ever again? Absolutely fuckin zero. Probably.
It's one thing to beseech the good name of a private education institution. It's another to do it to the tune of $27.00 per month. Now somebody invite her to Knicks locker room. She could be doing a lot more good for the world right now.
