Today's fix? Unfixable societal damage, the strongest vaginal lining in Arkansas and more teamwork than then Norway FIFA team. The PTA meeting is cancelled.
Not even an ounce of hesitation either. That corn husk has definitely missed it's fair share of schedule maintenance intervals, but it's still running like the day it was bought. In other words: Mom's gonna be driving it until the wheels fall off.
If her facial expressions look familiar to you, then you too have felt the sweet kiss of Red Lobster's endless shrimp platter. A feeling taken from us all way too soon...
If she weighs less than a sac of Power Ranger VHS tapes and has the depth to match, it's gotta be a Becky-Lynn getting turned into a bowl of mashed potatoes.
You've heard that one before. But it's never been so accurate after seeing >five consecutive minutes of the world's most undesirable creatures run wild in their natural habitat. If anything at all proving that Valtrex should be a public company.
A vaginal opening that doesn't look like it's seen the wheels of an El Dorado is a welcomed change. Perhaps if OF creators could keep the Tampa Bay Buccaneers' starting line outside of their underwears this could become a hot new trend.
Is it me or is it kinda weird when OF girls start collabing? Like what the fuck is the intro message for this behavior? "wanna fly in to our state so we can share a plate of my boyfriend's asshole and charge people $27.00 dollars a month to watch?"
If there's anything these South American floozys do right with their 3600 baud Internet and flip phone cameras, it's this. Pack ur favorite anti viral and take notes.
Becky McSnagglepuss channels her inner sorority girl to give Alfonso and friends a one-time look at the kind of minge that requires double vaccination. #tourism
Crazy proportions but the odds of this happening in the back of an econo sedan are slim to none. What you need to get yourself is the Ford F150 with the dynamic cousin package. Just don't hit every branch on the way down the family tree.
This was voted the #2 reason to wake up Saturday morning with an unexplained rash in between your ass cheeks. Only falling short to raw dogging The Big Arch.
Don't let the optimistic smiles fool you. This social media misfit has less concern for the ringus around her bingus than a unionized construction worker on his lunch break. aka damage is imminent. Oh well. Try your best, DLSS5 the rest.
Not every day someones title has me scratching all three nuts in bewilderment. But "Dumb Flashlight with Cow Tits" is a choice. Not even all 32 volumes of Encyclopedia Britannica are any help and my disappointment is immeasurable.
The title may be bs, but at least it's not A.I. An unfortunate level of acceptance our dystopian future has waiting for us when it comes to waxin the carrot. Almost as depressing as that spine tattoo acting as a roadmap to her Hersey Kiss faucet.
If only the avg girl put this much effort into carving out an a-hole that belongs in a museum, maybe I wouldn't be talking to a therapist about my sexual attraction to Reese's peanut butter cups this weekend. E-books will be written about this.
Is this considered 'kink shaming' now? It's easier to adopt Cantonese than trying to keep up with today's TikTok dictionary, so excuse me if it actually is. What I do know is dude's face at the 1:11 mark means the situation is genuinely not bussin.
Alright it's time for these South American couples to scale it back a fucking notch. Most OF girls barely expose a pubic hair for 6 figure days, meanwhile Valentina and friends are facing radical spinal surgery for less than 2 scoops of rocky road.
Advertise whatever sigma male, MGTOW LARP fantasy you want. But let me tell ya something... you just haven't lived a fulfilling life until walking in on your solid 3/10 getting shined up by the guy who considers Volkswagen a luxury vehicle.