Much like the Fast and Furious movie franchise, this went from mildly amusing to, "it's time to stop" pretty daggon quickly. The tipping point involves an ass-to-ass audible plan B teeth-biter after failing to fly his dick ship to the orbit of Heranus.
One romantic moment after another breaks out in front of an unwilling audience. (see: ME) And if that second-to-last photo is any indication of a Saturday night in Albuquerque I may need to make a few adjustments to my Trivago itinerary ASAP
First time squirters, prolapse-induced climaxes and bittersweet hategasms... today's vid has more variety than a fuckin Sizzler salad bar. Best comes last, so I recommend you see this one all the way through
Compliments are a rarity around these parts, but I will say the college brat in picture #12 has the kind of coin slot that turns boyfriends into ex-husbands. However, something tells me it's seen it's fair share of Walmart denim.
This site clickbaits titles worse than CNN during an election cycle, so ignore their description. When this first hit the Internet a decade ago it was labeled as "MILF HOOKER" and judging by the gravity on those powdered milk bags, I believe it.
Burritos are burritos man, I don't discriminate. But when your bum crumbs are in the vicinity of my guacamole, you're walking on that thin line of reprehensible. Now put your underwear back on before my sour cream is on the house. #bet
Well over an hour of the most abrasive beefy bazooka blowouts to ever have the luxury of being caught on film. Some people will be turned off to anal for life. Others will discover a new path to restraining orders. But all will be entertained.
This is all but guaranteed to eradicate any story you may have been led to believe about how hard it is to bang an established pornstar. Don't be misled by this man's total lack of enthusiasm: Your hunt of commissioned snapper begins now.
Public Lewdness: Some go for the shock factor of emptying their ass into a garbage can at Wendy's. Others do it to raise their Internet stock a few more points. Something tells me this girl is willing to sample both of these columns.
Not since The Mannetard have I seen such an intense level of misogyny. (this month) Unfortunately there's no followup story to this adventure... but what it lacks in explanations, it makes up for in semi-orgasmic zombie-like moaning.
Getting a piece on the side is pretty straight-forward: Swipe right a few times on Tinder and let the self-loathing begin. Unless you're a dumbass rookie that thinks the 25 upvotes on your Pornhub page are worth the label ultrous skankarous.
Don't get fooled by the i live in a double wide and listen to Limp Bizkit on cassette tape starter kit. This burnt out Becky is a total stranger to the world of punching starfishes. Our part of the Internet refers to this as false motherfuckin advertising.
Girls that only put out for basketball player height and Baywatch-era David Hasslehoff chest hair: They're about as exciting as a Bernie Sanders erotic fan-fiction. But when the catfishing actually pays off, things like this happen...
This is what happens when pressure to get attention social media goes too far. Friendships are exiled, Starfishes are puckered - all because some jackoff had to keep his hands busy between double fisting Natty Ice during a UFC payperview.