The amount of middle-aged women trying to relive their glory days of slobbering dong adjacent to marked down summer fashion pieces, is way too damn high.
She surprisingly lacked the standard amount of lip filler that could inflate the tire of an industrial corn harvester, so the authenticity stood a chance. Then this guy's facial reactions start flaring & slowly took this one from "believable" to "autistic".
I didn't even realize Bailey was still active. Then her [twitter] account popped up and showed it's possible to quadruple the size of your tits without surgery? wtf?
A public service announcement on the cons and cons of searching for discounted hookers lurking in Craigslist's general section. If the intimate relationship with $5 scratch off tickets doesn't erect your cock, the aroma of Newport Menthols will.
The originator of "hyper squirting" back in the early days of MFC, XFuukaX is not only still active but she's pissing her pants on a pay-per-video basis now. #bidness
Double team raw dogging a lady of the night sure is a bold choice. Almost as bold as filming, saving and consequently having your wife stumble upon said video because you forgot how cloud backups work. That daggone syphilitic technology.
Maybe zero is a harsh criticism. We all have to start somewhere. It's just that most recipients of the Gawkoluxious 3000 would prefer making it out of the tutorial 1st.
She claims this is legit, and it's the first time "meeting" this dude. Okay lady, sure. And the gangrene I got from "introducing" myself to a stripper that considers Canadian pennies a form of payment will just go away with fast orange and water.
This woman is the Nelson Mandela of butt blasting. A sacrificial lam if you will. I thought I was a charitable dude after donating 2.5 bags of Hot Cheetos to my local soup kitchen. That's diddly fuckin dick compared to this selfless act.
Mariah's trip to Pumptown proves memorable. For the guy trying to double-dip, not her. spoiler: the microbiome on that couch is the final boss in Resident Evil 9.
I remember when couples would upload their finest Nokia flip vids onto websites that couldn't get cleared for an SSL certificate. So trust when I say having more flash tattoos than visible skin is a bit distracting from the story ur trying to tsell.
When you're waving around an object commonly mistaken for a Japanese culinary tool, it's gotta be hard to find willing recipients/casualty. So give it up for Becky Wonderpuss, who know now hears an echo with every footstep she takes.
A Chilean degenerate that treats her butthole like a dollar menu side order? The villain arc is practically writing itself. Start getting blocked on her Twitter [here]
Alright it's time for these South American couples to scale it back a fucking notch. Most OF girls barely expose a pubic hair for 6 figure days, meanwhile Valentina and friends are facing radical spinal surgery for less than 2 scoops of rocky road.
George Lopez is juiced to the gills and managed to procure one of Starbuck's finest Coffee Artists™. The result? Only her gynecologist and Jiffy Lube knows.
Only two situations leave a person with that look on their face. And both involve serious velocity of the rectal cavity. So this is either post-anal or post-white castle.
