If everybody is born with a gift, hers is performing acts of infidelity without as much as a trace of last night's double serving of guacamole streaked onto the finest imported vegan leather. That's gotta be worth something to somebody.
The camera never pans downtown, so we don't know if that blowhole has more gape in it than the San Andreas Fault. But despite her knuckle oven seeing diapers before the age of 30 or not, dude landed himself a bonafide superstar.
In what must be the lowest effort "muh content!" video of the fucking year, this pair of cornballs pull off Twitch-levels of cringe. office_noise.mp3 has been put on notice. You know it's bad when Bangladeshi comments are calling you boring lul
Stewart and his local Dungeons and Dragons chapter approach your wife with their war drums out, looking for an impromptu handicap match. What do you do?
If uve been gifted the dimensions of a jar of grammas old fashioned marmalade, then you may have never experienced this situation. Alpha Chads such as yourself would power through both this interruption, and the following domestic assault.
Supergirl gets the director's cut we've all been waiting for, the French prove that giving up is never an option and that giraffe neck havin mother fucker in the last clip single handedly puts an end to the skinny jeans market. All this and more...
A vaginal opening that doesn't look like it's seen the wheels of an El Dorado is a welcomed change. Perhaps if OF creators could keep the Tampa Bay Buccaneers' starting line outside of their underwears this could become a hot new trend.
Tip for my ever-evolving female fan base: If you ever find yourself in this situation, make sure you order the blooming onion beforehand. The unsuspecting stranger will be gifted a soundtrack AI could never replicate. Don't ask me how I know.
More [here] where the story is her BF launching a nuclear attack on a neighboring country is apparently less important than her fat tits in a Party City maid costume.
Those tits have gone through more transformations than Matt Hardy's wrestling career over the years. Literally 1.5 decades of confusion. Believe it or not she still offers access to them for less than the cost of a Tim Horton's breakfast sandwich.
idk what kind of Amish paradise rules they agreed to before making the match, but this shit doesn't work for me brother. Interesting loophole though. It's kind of like tax harvesting, where the people watching are the only ones getting fucked.
Hitting the finish line after your first time out is kind of impressive to be honest. It usually takes the education system at least two tries to fuck you out of existence.
Honestly, I'm shocked. And by shocked I mean quietly contemplating how much longer it will take social media to completely remove all empathetic reasoning from the human genome. Direct all your body fluids accordingly. More [here]
Earning your brown belt in the front seat of an economy car with your wedding ring glinting in the pale phone light has to be some sort of modern day Picasso. To outdo it, next time ur gonna have to attempt the [kentucky tractor puller]
This soviet harlot has been getting around recently. Judging from this page alone she has more watchable hours than the average Asmongold lurker. (that's a lot)
She may be all giggles and Valtrex right now, but the 3:00AM smile will soon fade once Becky Smackapuss gets the dry cleaning bill for that Target linen. #doomed
What's that old saying? Go big or go home? If it's in her ass she's all class? If your tip is brown shut it down? I don't know but someone probably just got a raise.