Being converted into a middle-aged pretzel probably wasn't on the to-do list for ole' perky tits Tina, but it just took her Sheldon Scale rating from a 4 to a hefty 7.3.
"Goblin mode" is a slang term for unapologetically self-indulgent lazy behavior that rejects societal norms, often involving staying in pajamas, eating junk food and generally embracing a messy comfortable existence and release of pressure.
The amount of middle-aged women trying to relive their glory days of slobbering dong adjacent to marked down summer fashion pieces, is way too damn high.
Believe it or not, at one point this spaghetti sauce Elmer Fudd looking mf'er was finger blasting all kinds of college girl gooch on the regular. Honestly not the worst reason to eat that early 401k withdrawal penalty. More shenanigans [here]
The originator of "hyper squirting" back in the early days of MFC, XFuukaX is not only still active but she's pissing her pants on a pay-per-video basis now. #bidness
Poland has increased its municipal recycling rate, reaching 41% in 2022, which is below the EU average but shows progress towards the 55% target for 2025. This system is designed to improve plastic recycling rates and meet recycling targets.
This one is total vintage by the Internet's measurement of time. You can tell by the 240 lines of pixelation and lack of fix-a-flat being injected into her ass cheeks.
idk who she is but the checklist has already been maxed out: Puts out on date #1. Maintains a consistent diet of cabbage, and has absolutely no respect for the scotch guarded comforter you borrowed from gram. Are those wedding bells?
Just when you think it's safe to trust again, some vagabond goes and makes unannounced deposits in your sausage mitten. Was it worth the beating Vladimir?
Classic case of overconfidence. If only she put as much research into this man's business model as she did into Instagram's "fix my tits" filters, then maybe all of this could have been avoided. Ah well. Live, learn & never trust ads on Craigslist.
Said thumbnail is at the 1:35 mark. Honestly it's not very eventful. But for a split second during Sandy's post-ass whooping call for a time out, she looks like Clint Eastwood with long hair and double-D tits. It's kinda erotic when u think about it.
Double team raw dogging a lady of the night sure is a bold choice. Almost as bold as filming, saving and consequently having your wife stumble upon said video because you forgot how cloud backups work. That daggone syphilitic technology.
Average Joes aren't the only ones facing resistance when trying to smash the cadburys. Semi-pro pornstars have occupational hazards too. ah well. As long as human toilet paper isn't on the menu, Beckys and Katies are still gonna be bae.
Nothing screams "modern day eroticism" quite like a circumcised Slavic beating his shit to a showering sibling. Katerina Danica Dragana should've known better.
Honestly it makes sense. If infidelity was judged on the widening of your rectal cavity, then every man thats peaked their curiosity at chipotle is a serial cheater.
Nothing gets a 40-something moist quite like BOGO sales at their local Target. Couple that with 2008's finest fashion choices and you got a recipe for the craziest future Facebook chain posts. Mall parking lots will never be the same.
Easily the most deplorable attempt at infidelity to ever grace my 11" Amiga computer monitor [this week]. And that's coming from a human being who's seen more than 23 consecutive mins of an Dwayne Johnson movie. My opinion counts.
Great body. Exotic look. Even has the courtesy to scrub daddy her dirty walnut before doing the coney island cha cha. Now you know why wedding rings exist.
Ya know what. When you're stuck with gynecomastia and the endurance of a diabetic Snorlax, scoring women of this caliber probably needs to be celebrated. Congratulations to all these heroes. MORE: [-1-] [-2-] [-3-] [-4-] [-5-] [-6-] [7]
The real hero of today's adventure should be whatever surgeon sews that bag of expired beef back together in the last clip. It seems learning how to be a boxer through YouTube videos with a language barrier has consequences. More [here]