Like the thunderdome, a Woody casting means two enter but only 1 leaves with a working sphincter. The following rush to Costco's adult diaper section is usually a dark day in the victim's life... but not today. Double BOOM. Double DOOM. [more]
Fun fact: When she's performing the filthy tugboat (see: anal intercourse) her vaginal lips create some sort of effect that resemble a trained seal clapping. wtf?
Gotta respect a man that can make a white girl stop in her tracks faster than a Target clearance sale by simply removing his Nike Dri-FITs, and hangin' brain.
Becky McSnagglepuss channels her inner sorority girl to give Alfonso and friends a one-time look at the kind of minge that requires double vaccination. #tourism
The dude behind the camera has survived genital-disfiguring diseases amidst bulldozing through 27% of the pacific north west's bucket of baddies. Maybe Gorlock needs to make a cameo next time. That's the secret ending we all earned.
ah, the old "my sister ate moon grass and fell on my penis" trick. A classic move, but one that gonna need more practice if it's going to give Limpin Larry enough motivation to erect the other half of his penis for her. #cialis pancho. Look into it.
Downside to living with a depraved girl from Frogballs Arkansas? Every time you get half a hard-on, it's time to perform. But the produce is usually fresh so... win.
"...but the husband joined". A very common scenario in high pressure cities that commonly charge over $9.00 for cups of coffee with pictures drawn on them.
If you're the kind of gentleman that prides himself on enjoying the finer things in life (Little Caesars $7 carry outs, director cuts of Nicholas Cage independent movies etc.) then this set of generational milkers is sure to win your little heart.
Karen McGoonerson is presented a with a choice: Dance with the mayonnaise maraca she's been married to for the past 4 years, or gallop with the chocolate clydesdale. Do you really have to guess how this one is gonna end? [painfully]
Any gentleman out there already knows shooting with Shae Summers was the peak of postmodernism pornography. What you may not know is she's a [gypsy healer] now? idk wtf that means but it probably involves your wallet and her tits.
"Goblin mode" is a slang term for unapologetically self-indulgent lazy behavior that rejects societal norms, often involving staying in pajamas, eating junk food and generally embracing a messy comfortable existence and release of pressure.
Requesting $14.00 for a cup of pre-burnt plastic coffee beans from the jungles of Madagascarfuckyourself rly should come w/ a point card that redeems this prize.
Believe it or not, at one point this spaghetti sauce Elmer Fudd looking mf'er was finger blasting all kinds of college girl gooch on the regular. Honestly it's not the worst reason to eat that early 401k withdrawal penalty. More shenanigans [here]
I'm getting the impression this lady is no stranger to shotgunning a couple servings of Butthole du Jour after a succulent Chinese meal. But hit 88mph, and she calls more timeouts than a Discord moderator walking up a flight of stairs.
idk what kind of Amish paradise rules they agreed to before making the match, but this shit doesn't work for me brother. Interesting loophole though. It's kind of like tax harvesting, where the people watching are the only ones getting fucked.
"Japan is utilizing piezoelectric technology to convert footsteps into electricity, particularly in high-traffic areas like Tokyo's Shibuya and Tokyo stations. Embedded in flooring, these piezoelectric tiles produce small electric charges."
Pretty fuckin impressive build there. I bet you'd double fist the pelmeni borscht out of your own slavic shithole just to get within arm's reach of those juice bags.
Short of being an extra on Rocco's Retirement Village Tour (2035) I'm not sure these talents r beneficial. Never knowing the feels of a consensual relationship maybe? An existence without having to shop for birthday gifts? i dunno man...
Before the faux outrage begins; no this bullshit isn't real. This is clout zombie BronwinAuora who's newest grift seems to be convincing a janitor to play duos.