Did flashing interns at the local 7-11 becoming a challenge or something? Apparently this miscreant prefers the orifices less traveled. Specifically the ones small enough to give Tiger Woods anxiety attacks. C-L-A-S-S-Y.
Owning a Boat: aka the most over-hyped financial shitpit lie you were told about increasing your chances of getting laid. free tip: it doesn't work. Statistically speaking Chipotle gift cards and tribal tattoos have a better success rate. relevant
Becky LaStarbuck's safe space gets invaded by some degenerate clawing his way to 500 likes and subscribes... only to find the find the school's biggest petri dish instead. Does she: 1) Demand he stop 2) Compare dick sizes or 3) Not budge.
A Cardi B cocktail, Walmart toilet seats and discounted Rice-a-Roni at a swap meat: All things I'd commit to before slapping a ring on the talons of one of these harpies. Pay attention boys: One day it might be half of YOUR Amiibo collection.
Not even sure what the hell is going on here. I see too much ink, Too little foresight and a modified hospital bed normally reserved for My 600 lb Life. No further info than that, so... time for some hashtags. #doublestandards #hetoo
After shlogging a good 90% of the right-swipe rejects on FarmersMeet.com - you are entitled to a bone being thrown your way. And here I thought I've seen jevery angle there is to enter a Pottery Barn cashier from... but I was wrong. So wrong.
Contrary to appearance, she didn't beat herself to death with a Dashboard Confessional CD after this wound up online. But her usefulness is spent faster than a black man's paycheck at Footlocker so... fap with +5 to agility.
Scarlette Mae. aka the newest reason to stock up on all mayonnaise-based lubricants and clear your schedule. If a degenerate ride sharer from Jersey City can get 14 minutes with her, there obviously a chance for us all. #bolieve
It's 2019 and i had sexual relations with my third cousin's sister-mom porn is alive and well. Whatever... at this point we can't stop it. Just cross both balls & hope the trend doesn't extend itself into Burger King commercials. Some things are sacred.
for fuck sakes lady - not even Ant Man could end game his way through that sphincter. Great try though. I dub you the wildest gender-conforming white female i'd consider having sex with after a thorough round of lice testing.
The more they look like a Fortnite player, the more sexually inept they are. A simple concept now reinforced by this Pop Tart artisan trying to experience his first kobly gobbly. Let's just say this: The date at GameStop is officially cancelled.
This is all but guaranteed to heighten your curiosity of any legitimate family tree exploration stories out there. Don't be soured by the 47 clickbait titles it took for you to land here - your quest for honesty on the Internet lives here and now.
Skylar Valentine. Standing at a legitimate 4'7, she may be the only girl that can rim you without having to bend the knee. Daenerys Targaryen might consider that an act of disrespect. Everyone else considers it side-chick material.
Maybe you disagree, but we at least have a contender here. A twenty-something contortionist from Arizona with all 31 flavors of Baskin Robbins below her bush line may eventually take the throne... but for now, the seat is occupied. #winning
protip for my ever-evolving female viewer base: If you ever find yourself in this situation, make sure you order the blooming onion first. Outback servers tend to frown upon this kind of behavior out of the gate. Ask me how I know.
Daddy-issue appearance without the feminist dick-hating. Not a bad piece of flib flab. Would I take her out on a date to Wendy's? No. Would I want to use her vaginal utopia to power an indoor slip and slide? Hell to the mother fuckin maybe.
The Midwest: Some go for affordable street drugs. Others, go to make videos that can fuel an entire season of Dr. Phil. This guy does both. 1st he loads up on Slurm, then he shows his sister-cousin who's the boss of this double-wide. A role model?
She's pretty hot. So hot I'd consider parting with my first-edition Lindsay Lohan love doll just for a fighting chance at being lost inside that Japanese bush fire. Yes, I'm talking about the rare pre "i snorted Tide Pods before it was cool" version.
If your the kind of man that can enjoy white girls giving back to a marginalized community, then this is the video for you. Don't give a fuck about philanthropy? Then perhaps another video showcasing women's talent suits you better.
Funny how porn has evolved from basic penetration, into an ambitious race to see who's more willing to donate their genitals to medical research. She's Melody Marks and she just gave my wiener reason to watch The Walking Dead again.