For a minute there I was starting to lose faith in white female's ability to keep me entertained. Then I was introduced to a vagina with more bounce in it than Spalding has ever produced in 50 years. #WIN
Congratulations! You just disobeyed 50 generations of strict sexual guidelines to give southern white males their biggest erections since the Michael Brown verdict.
Crash course on how to turn your turd cutter into a perma-gaped coal mine. No CGI: Just a girl from Idaho that converted her fart pipe into a Dyson DC50. It's literally one Rosetta Stone away from communicating.
When all your knowledge of cinematography comes from Keanu Reeves, this is the result. I may have inadvertently just uncovered a new action genre even Jason Statham would be embarrassed to participate in.
Say hello to your new obsession. Not only does she incorporate all parts of the male genitalia into her blowjobs, "not-scared-of-sudden-seminal-gagging" is on her resume too. How could I NOT link to this video?
Raquel Balboa turns this guy's egg sac into her own personal speed bag. I mean straight up going Mr. Miyagi on his hangers without breaking a sweat. A video hasn't made me clench so tightly since this classic.
Becky and the blind Guatemalan she hired to ink her orangutang booty have some explaining to do. I think it's best you find the nearest wood chipper and lower those cheeks into it. Even FEMA can't help you now.
Her v-hole is capable of filling a solo cup quicker than a bar tap but when she goes maximum spread @ 9:27 it looks like the Predator on picture day. Do I fap or flee?
A no-questions asked handjob in the loading area of Bed Bath and Beyond would put the smile on any man's face... but not Carlos. Who shit in his Baja Chalupa?
I've never seen a video with Mia Malkova that made me question my erection, even when she's wearing her ass as a hat. But after edging myself through this scene...
Can't really blame her. Dude's bush looks like the top of Eddie Murphy's head circa de Beverly Hills Cop 1. If you had to go face-to-egg bag with a nut sac that requires a hairnet, you'd be squinting pretty fucking hard too.
Undoubtedly the most daring group of sex offenders this planet has ever seen. I must note though - nobody was hurt, fantasies were fulfilled and these girls got something to tweet about other than being fat. #WIN
Everybody is born with a gift. Clearly his is having the Optimus Prime of genitalia. Watch in utter amazement as nothing more than a single-handed choke hold transforms his Oscar Mayer into a portobello mushroom.
Additional chromosomes and fantastic genetics have combined forces for the greater good. How? Let's just put it this way: Boners will rise when you see her tits. Boners will (probably) deflate when you see this FACE.
How/Why this female is stimulated enough to have an orgasm is beyond my knowledge. Her sexual partners include a ventriloquist dummy hung like Patrick Ewing and whatever 25,000 Dave n Buster coupons can buy.
Here's a hotel review I'd like to see on TripAdvisor: Conveniently adjacent to highway 45, where all westbound traffic can get a clear view of your battle-fatigued piss cutter. Consider my reservation booked.
3:00AM cuckolding session goes from good idea to I think I need a gynecologist as Darius Williams the 3rd repeatedly bulldozes Becky's reproductive system. Award-winning cries of fear @ 1:30, 7:16 and 16:55.
I'll bet 30 Pesos & all 3 self-taped VHS copies of House Party 2 that she spent more time teaching her tits to twerk than studying for that GED. A moral decision that will most definitely pay off at the next ICP concert.
Sticking your dick into crazy girls without any consequences is about as probable as an Ebola outbreak in Beverly Hills... but I do admire her bravery. What do you think? Hit it, or hit it with a golf club?
An eFukt classic circa de 2005. Same story: Upon discovery of Curious Carlos, this banshee emits a war cry that would make Conan the Barbarian shit himself 40 yards away. I'm still just as confused in 480p.
